Hayes merely shakes his head and takes the bag when it’s handed to him. The bag finally gets back to Mia and she grabs her sandwich.
She sets the coffee carrier down and hands everyone their order. She ends up sitting in the chair beside her dad.
Having her so close and not being able to touch her or even look at her like she’s nothing more than an acquaintance sucks. I should be used to it, but I’m not.
I unwrap my sandwich and start to eat, forcing myself not to look at her.
I hate this feeling, like I’m living a lie, like somehow what we’re doing is dirty and wrong.
I did dirty and wrong for years, I’m man enough to admit that. I was an asshole, a jerk, I used women and they used me. With Mia it’s more. She’s my girlfriend for fuck’s sake and I can’t act like it because she’s not ready to tell her dad … and when she does, when we do … this all might go away. Everything my band and I have been working for might disappear. The fact they know that and aren’t demanding I end it should be cause enough for her dad to see this is real.
Something tells me he won’t be so logical.
I’m in love with his daughter, the little girl he’s vowed to protect, and my past goes against me. Nothing I’ve don
e proves I can treat a girl right, least of all a girl like Mia.
Honestly, I don’t know why my own mom hasn’t chewed me out. She’s probably wanted to, but she knows I’m stubborn and won’t listen to her nagging.
She was positively giddy when I told her about Mia. I want nothing more than for the two of them to meet. Mia would love her, and in return she would love Mia.
I polish off my sandwich and start on the other, still studiously ignoring my girlfriend.
Hayes and the guys are talking about the songs and changes they think we should make. I interject my opinion here and there, but my mind is in another dimension. I’m not invested like I should be.
Finishing my second sandwich I ball up the foil and sit back, crossing one leg over my knee and holding my coffee.
Mia’s eyes catch mine and she gives me a small smile before spinning away, still working on her breakfast sandwich.
I devour my food. She savors hers. It’s kind of cute how slow she eats. She’s like that a lot, stopping to savor moments, to take in everything, never wanting to miss a single second.
I want to get up and touch her, to hold her hand, to kiss her.
I can’t and it’s killing me.
If I had ever stopped to imagine myself in a relationship I would’ve been the one with the cold feet, not the girl, but here we are. I want her dad to know, for it to be out in the open and not this big fucking secret, but she doesn’t want him to know yet.
I know I have to respect her wishes, even if I want to blurt out right here and now I love this girl.
29
Mia
“Ooh, you’re going down,” I say to Rush, making finger guns and then pretending to blow out smoke.
“You wish, Little Hayes,” he remarks, picking up his bowling ball to take his turn.
“You’re going down, babe,” Kira tells him.
He looks over his shoulder at her. “Aren’t you supposed to be on my side?”
“I’m just fucking you.” She shrugs. “She’s my best friend. I choose her.”
“I’ll remember that,” Rush begins with a wicked grin, “when you’re begging me to lick your pussy.”
A woman gasps and we look over to see her slapping her hands over her son’s ears. “There are children in this establishment!”
“My bad,” Rush apologizes, but he doesn’t sound sorry at all. Kira herself is trying not to laugh.