I’m still not sure how I feel about him digging into my past, but in a way, I’m glad, because that meant I didn’t have to rehash the full story. He told me what he knew, and I filled in the gaps. I also gave him as many details as I could about Phillip.
I grab the bottle with breast milk I pumped a couple of hours ago from the counter, take the top off, and hand it over to Trouble. It’s not often I feed him by bottle, but in times when I need to be free, I do. Using the heel of his palm, he pushed the blanket out of the way and sets the nipple to Elijah’s lips. The greedy boy drinks immediately.
The room is quiet, so I look around. Judge is watching Trouble feed Elijah with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his slacks. His expression is grim, but also inquisitive. I’ve been around him a few times the last couple of weeks, and while he’s softened toward me some, I think it’s due to what happened to me. Which I don’t like because I want him to like me for me and not because of what I went through. I can tell he’s still very reserved.
I move my eyes to JW, who’s still standing beside Trouble. Whereas Judge appears slightly uncomfortable watching Trouble with Elijah, JW looks amused. His eyes stay mostly glued to the baby, but they keep flickering up to Trouble and one corner of his mouth is kicked up and mirth dances in his eyes. JW’s been the nicest of his three brothers.
Anytime I glance at Emo, I want to flinch. The expression on his face is always so serious. Serious, but also blank. I can never tell what he’s thinking, because he never shows anything on his face. Today is no different. His head is down, and his body is stiff. Feeling my eyes on him, he slowly glances up and his black eyes meet mine. My heart stops. I may not know what he’s thinking or feeling, but I know whatever it is must run dark. Always dark. A part of me wants to go to him and pull him into my arms and offer him comfort. The other part wants to step back and put more distance between us. His arms fall to his sides and he reaches inside one pocket and pulls something out. A glint of silver catches the light before he clenches his fist around it. I frown when I notice his white knuckles. Whatever’s in his hand must be breaking his skin from squeezing it so hard. I remember the scars I saw on his palms and my heart aches for him.
I break away from those thoughts and look back at Trouble.
“Lynn’s messaging me a picture she found of Phillip.”
The soft look from looking down at Elijah disappears from his face with my words. He stiffens, then nods.
“Good, because JW can’t find shit on record. Even his mug shot is missing, which I find really fuckin’ weird.”
I frown. “Why doesn’t he have a mug shot? I thought everyone who got arrested had one.”
“They’re supposed to,” JW answers. “I called Pike County and they don’t know why he doesn’t have one either. No record of his arrest, court proceedings, or conviction. It’s like it never happened.”
“What,” I whisper, fear slithering down my spine. “I don’t understand. How is that even possible?”
“No fuckin’ clue. Everyone in Pike County remembers the case because it’s still fresh in their mind, but no one knows why there’s no record of it. Someone wanted them gone and made it so. What’s really damn bizarre is there’s no record of a Phillip Lancaster at al
l in Pike County. No bank statements, no medical records, no bills with his name attached, nothing. The guy’s fuckin’ disappeared.”
The edge of my phone digs into my palm, hitting a nerve and sending a tingle up my arm. I rub the prickly spot and feel goosebumps rise on the surface.
“Can someone really do that?” My voice shakes from anxiety.
“Yes,” Emo grunts, and I look at him over my shoulder. His black eyes stare back at me. “If you’re good enough, you can do anything with a computer.”
“And if Emo can’t find anything about this guy, then there’s nothing to be found,” JW inputs.
“Either he has connections who’re damn good with computers or he’s a whiz himself.”
I face Trouble and see the steel line of his jaw. His hands may be gentle with Elijah right now, but there’s no mistaking the rigidness in his body or the anger that’s emitting from him. He’s pissed about the situation and it makes me glad it’s on my behalf.
I keep my eyes on him when I ask, “What am I going to do?”
“You aren’t doing anything except take care of your boy. My brothers and I will take care of Phillip. How certain are you that he’ll come for Elijah?”
My hair stands on end, and I close my eyes when I think about when Phillip was being lead out of the court room and the conviction in his voice as he coldly told me he was coming for his baby. The pure menace and sickening look of lust in his eyes still gives me nightmares if I think about it too long.
I push the image away before it can turn my stomach and cross my arms over my chest to ward off the sudden chill sweeping through my body.
“Very sure. He’ll come for him,” I answer vehemently.
He gives me a single nod before looking back down at Elijah.
“But,” I hesitate for only a moment. “Maybe he won’t be able to find me.”
“If he’s smart enough to delete any record of himself, he’ll be able to locate you. Especially if you’ve used any credit cards.”
Judge’s words have a lead ball sinking in my stomach.
My phone chirps in my hand, reminding me of the picture Lynn was sending over. I bring the phone to life and find an attachment waiting for me to download.