Whispered Prayers of a Girl

I didn’t even realize I was crying until he questioned me. I don’t answer him, and instead detach my nails from Alexander’s arm and move toward Daniel, making sure to walk slowly. Once I reach him, I haul him into my arms, the poor puppy squished between us. I lift my head and look over to where Kelsey is with the other horse.

Taking measured steps, Alexander walks closer to her. His movements seem casual, but I can see the tenseness in his back as he keeps his eye on the horse. Kelsey is no longer facing the horse, but is turned toward Alexander.

“Kelsey, honey, come over here with me please,” Alexander calls in a calm voice.

She looks back at the horse with longing and pets him one last time, before turning and meeting Alexander halfway. The beautiful smile of before is gone, replaced with a look of confusion.

As soon as Kelsey is within arm’s reach, Alexander drops to his knees and gathers her into his arms. I watch, more tears coming to the surface as he embraces her tightly, and I swear it’s like he was just as afraid for her as I was. Like the thought of harm coming to her hurt him just as much as it did me.

Turning to Daniel, I bent down. “Stay here.”

When he sees my firm look and gives me a nod, I leave him there and walk over to Alexander and Kelsey. Sensing my presence, Alexander releases her and stands. I only spare him a brief look before I’m pulling Kelsey into my arms. Now that I have her close and know she’s okay, the noose around my neck loosens, and I can finally breathe properly. More tears pour down my face.

The situation wasn’t that dire, but it could have been. When you have kids, the worst scenario always plagues you.

I sniff my tears away, then pull back and look at Kelsey. Her brows are pulled down into a frown as she looks at me.

“You and Daniel can’t run off like that,” I tell her sternly. “You both had me so worried. I had no idea where you were.”

“I was just showing her the horses, Mom,” Daniel says, walking up to me with Alexander at his side. He still looks bewildered. “Then I told her about feeding them apples and asked if she wanted to give it a try.”

Before I get a chance to explain to him the dangers of running off, Alexander beats me to it.

“Daniel,” he begins. “You’re supposed to always ask your mother before you take off like that. Something bad could have happened and we wouldn’t have known until it was too late. Had you waited just a few more minutes, I would have taken you and your sister to feed the horses.” Alexander puts his hand on Daniel’s shoulder and squeezes gently. “Remember what I told you about Bandit the other day?” He thinks for a minute, then nods. “He’s not a horse you want to be around at the moment.”

His words have my stomach dropping and panic wanting to take hold, but I force it down. The kids are okay, thank goodness, and hopefully have learned to not run off again. I still intend to ask Alexander later what he meant by the horse not being good to be around though. I’m not sure I like that he brought Daniel out here if he knew the horse was dangerous.

Forgetting it for now, I quickly hug Kelsey again and bend to place a kiss against the top of Daniel’s head.

I look over to Alexander and find him watching me with a soft expression on his face, but there’s still a hint of tension there. I give him a shaky smile, relieved and grateful he was here to help keep me calm. There’s no telling what I would have done had I come in the barn and found Kelsey standing in front of that horse. I certainly wouldn’t have kept still in my frantic state. He very well could be the only reason Kelsey and Daniel are still safe and unharmed.

As we walk back to the house, Daniel yapping away to Alexander about his puppy and Kelsey her normal silent self, I send up a silent prayer to God, thanking him for giving Alexander the ability to keep my kids safe.

Chapter 14

Alexander

“Wow! These are so cool!” Daniel shouts about all the wooden figurines in the box on the floor.

Seeing his excitement over something I’ve always cherished makes my damn insides giddy like a girl. After what happened earlier, I’ll definitely take the giddy stomach versus my heart feeling like it was being ripped from my chest.

When I ran in that barn and saw Kelsey in front of Bandit, my stomach bottomed out, and I damn near fell on my ass with the force of it. She looked so damn small compared to the huge animal. One wrong move and she would have been gone. Not wanting to spook the horse into doing something fatal, I had to force myself to stay in place, then force Gwen to do the same when she barreled into the room after me. Having no other choice but to watch Kelsey look death in the eye was one of the scariest things I’ve ever had to face. Knowing the love that Gwen has for her children and that she had to do the same thing, made it ten times worse.

I fucking hated just standing there, feeling like a worthless human being, as Kelsey teetered between being a healthy, beautiful girl and a dead one, but we had to be careful. Bandit is so unpredictable and has a violent streak, so using caution was a must. Dark memories of not being able to save Clara and Rayne tried pulling me under, but with iron will, I pushed the visions back. I had to stay focused. If I didn’t, Kelsey would have suffered.

But then the damndest thing happened. It both shocked the shit out of me and left me mystified. The fucking horse, the one that damn near took off my hand the other day, took the apple out of Kelsey’s hand with gentle movements. Then the bastard proceeded to pet her with his head. If it wasn’t for the huge amount of relief I felt at Kelsey being safe, I would have been pissed. All this time, the fucking animal’s been playing me.

Fucking prick.

Even so, I’m so fucking grateful he chose that moment to be mellow. I’d

take him biting off all my limbs over and over again versus him attacking Kelsey.

“You make sure you take really good care of them, okay?” Gwen says firmly, bringing me back to the present.

Daniel nods solemnly. “I will.”

My eyes move to Kelsey, who’s sitting on the floor with several of the puppies curled up against her legs. She’s not paying them any mind, but every so often I see her petting one. She has the new crossword puzzle book I made her in her lap. When I gave it to her, the smile she gave was small, but it was there nonetheless. It was her eyes that were more expressive. She was happy about the book. Coming from someone who doesn’t show happiness often, the look was a big deal. Each new smile from her makes my own pain lessen. I’ve come to realize that making Kelsey smile or even show just a hint of joy is something I enjoy doing.