This can’t be happening.
He seems so calm. Like everything that just happened is normal, but nothing about today has been normal. Normal was on another planet and we’ve moved two galaxies away.
Asher takes a large, exaggerated breath that spans the time of four of mine. He does that again and says, “Like this.”
I copy him, forcing my breathing to match his slow and steady pace. After a few seconds, I feel my lungs fill and a weight lift from my chest. Today has been a whirlwind. I don’t know which part was worse—coming to school looking and feeling like I’d been run over by a truck, pissing Liam off; or needing Asher, of all people, to talk me through a panic attack.
Asher pulls a couple of stools out from one of the tables and sits across from me. “You good?”
“Yeah.” As good as I can be from emotional whiplash. I’ve gone from Liam’s closet girlfriend to Asher’s newest conquest in a matter of hours. At least only half of the rumors are true. I sit onto the other stool and brush my cheeks with the back of my hand. Black water stains my skin and I realize the makeup Maggie worked so hard on this morning is ruined. I run my fingers under my eyes then wipe them on my skirt. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Going along with all that craziness.” I flick my wrist, indicating I’m talking about what went down in the cafeteria. I don’t know what to call it besides crazy.
Asher’s lips lift in the corner. I like his smile, which is terrifying because, before today, it’s been years since I’ve noticed it. “It’s cool. It was kind of fun.”
“Why’d you do it? Say we’re together?”
Asher rubs his jaw. He stares at the wall behind me, searching his thoughts. After too many moments of quiet, he meets my gaze again. “I didn’t like what people were saying about you today.”
Panic slithers down my spine. I’ve known all day that my name has been in people’s mouths, but no one has had the balls to say any of it to my face. Everything I know about today’s gossip is speculation based on snippets I’ve caught. “What are they saying?”
Asher shakes his head and looks down at his hands. “Nothing. It doesn’t matter, because everyone thinks you’re mine now.”
“We aren’t together, Asher. Don’t you think people will be suspicious when they see you hooking up with someone else?” They might not. I mean, I was Liam’s backup girl. Their words, not mine. Would it be so hard to imagine that I could be the same for Asher? I shudder. I don’t want people to think I’m an easy lay with no morals.
“We’ve only got a few weeks left, Ellie. I can keep my hands to myself.”
“But why would you want to?”
I’m trembling, only I’m not cold. My nerves are shot and the thought of being Asher’s girlfriend is too much to handle. Even if it is fake. We aren’t enemies but we haven’t exactly been friends either. Outside of lunch, I don’t hang out with him. We have nothing in common. Asher spends all of his free time at parties or down some hussy’s pants. Whereas I am either with Liam, Maggie, or at home.
I shake my head, finding more flaws with Asher’s plan the longer I think about it. “Liam will never forgive us if we do this. Are you willing to throw years of friendship away over a fake girlfriend? Because I can promise you nothing is gonna happen between us, Asher.”
“Liam’s dad slept with my mom. He’s not my friend, Ellie. He’s my half-brother.”
“What?” I stare at Asher in disbelief and wait for him to elaborate because there is no way in hell I heard him right.
Asher shrugs like this bit of information is no big deal. It’s a HUGE fucking deal. A mind-blowing, world tipping big deal. Everything makes sense now. The fights with our parents. Them forbidding us to see Asher and yet, except for the third grade, we’ve always been in the same school. Even though he’s never lived in the right school zone. “How long have you known?”
“Since the sixth grade. The only reason I was able to come to Ridgewater freshman year is because Derek pulled some strings. The old principal was adamant that, because I was out of zone, I couldn’t come here.” Asher pauses to flash a wicked grin. “I obviously got my way.”
That smile falls and Asher rubs his palms across his thighs, then rests his hands on his knees. “Anyway, Liam likes to throw it in my face that I’m a home-wrecking bastard. I didn’t intend to drag you into our drama, Ellie. I just wanted to know why you were sitting by yourself today, but then Liam started with his usual malarkey and I snapped. He acts like he owns you.”
“He’s just protective.” I look down at my hands, embarrassed. Liam can be possessive at times, but it’s only because he loves me. At least, that's what I've always told myself. Now, I’m not so sure.
“No, Liam wants to have his cake and eat it too, which is bullshit.” Asher stands and pushes his stool back under the table. “What do you say?” He holds out his hand. “Be my fake girlfriend for the last few weeks of school.”
I take it and let him help me to my feet. On a normal day, I’d be thrown by Asher’s show of chivalry. Today, however, I think I’ve gone numb. He pushes my stool back under the table, beside his, but doesn’t let me go. A tingle of… something… trickles through my veins. Like the kiss, I don’t want to think about the feeling, let alone figure out what it means. “I don’t know.”
“Come on, Ellie. By now, the rumors will be running rampant. Everyone probably thinks we’re together anyway.” He pauses, waiting for my response but I’m still unsure. “Did you see the way L
iam looked at us?”
“Yeah.” I sigh, thinking about the way Liam's eyes narrowed on me. “He was pissed.”
“No, he was jealous. Guys want what they can’t have, and I publicly took you off the market.”