Asher grits his teeth and runs a hand through his dark hair. “Let it go, Ellie. That’s not anything you need to worry about.”
I don’t need to worry about it? For someone who wants to be my fake-boyfriend, he sure has a lot of secrets. I have no secrets. My life is an open book that, apparently, everyone has read the Cliffnotes on. I’m so mad I could scream, and the only person around to take my frustrations out on is Asher. “My name is Lainey. Why can’t you get that through your head, Asher? L. A. I. N. E. Y. Lainey.”
Asher’s hand, still holding the helmet, falls to his side. “You weren’t Lainey until he decided El wasn’t a good enough nickname. Until he changed you and turned you into his perfect groupie. Even as a kid, your head was so far up Liam’s ass you couldn’t see through all his shit. I will never call you Lainey because you are so much more than what he’s made you to be.”
“Stop it!” I scream, my emotions getting the best of me. My internal compass is spinning from mad to sad and right back to mad again, over and over. “I won’t let you ruin the memories I have. Liam was my best friend. He looked out for me. Kept me safe from jerks like you.”
“I’m the jerk?” Asher stares at me, shocked. He shakes his head, equal parts frustration and anger passing over his face. “El, everyone knows you two were fucking. Liam bragged to anyone who would listen about how easy it was to get you into bed. How all he had to do was make empty promises you both knew would never come true.”
“You’re lying,” I yell through a pool of tears. I don’t want to believe Liam would do that, even if I know it’s true. I want to hold onto the illusion that he was my best friend who loved me.
“You already know I’m not lying, Ellie.” Asher’s face falls.
The way he’s looking at me, it’s like he can feel my pain and it makes this conversation hurt more. No one should have their heart ripped apart the way mine is.
“I’ve never lied to you, not once, in all the years we’ve known each other.”
I wipe my nose with the back of my hand and sniffle. “You’re right. You just kept things from me, like who your dad is, and became a royal asshole in the process.”
Asher reaches for my arm but I pull it away. His brows furrow and then he sighs. “I know, and I’m sorry. If I could go back in time and change how I’ve treated you, I would. But I’m trying to be a better person, Ellie. And I’m trying to make sure no one fucks with you. Guys are assholes. They’re only after one thing.”
“What about you? Doesn’t that mean you’re only here for one thing too?”
I arch my brows at him and cross my arms again. A feeling burns its way through the darkness eating me up from the inside out. The feeling of desire makes my skin squirm with delight. It’s a feeling I have no business experiencing. I bite my lip and calculate the date in my head. Maybe my period is coming. Maybe that’s why I’m such a mess.
“If I thought I had a shot with you, then maybe.” He smirks and my treacherous heart speeds up. How I can go from angry, to crying, to nervous is beyond me. Thankfully, Asher doesn’t notice because he adds, “But I know better.”
I force the heady butterflies fluttering inside me back into the dark cave they flew out of. I wipe the tears from my cheeks and say, “You humiliated me in the sixth grade, called me shark bait, and made fun of me more times than I can count. Don’t get me started on the daggers you shoot from across the hall. How do you expect me to forget all of that and be your friend, let alone your fake girlfriend, Asher?”
“First of all, I was fifteen for ninety percent of your accusations. I was pissed off at the world and jealous as a mother fucker.”
“Jealous?” Maybe I could accept that excuse if his animosity had been directed towards Liam, or Russell, or any of the guys he hangs out with that have a functioning family with two parents. But me? On the outside, it would appear that I fall into that category, but Asher knows better. He saw firsthand when we were kids how much my dad works. It got so bad last year, Mom thought he was having an affair. My life isn’t anything to be jealous of. “Of what?”
“It doesn’t matter.” Asher shakes his head and climbs off his motorcycle. “What matters is that I’m sorry. For all of it.”
“You hurt my feelings. I know that sounds lame, but I had serious self-esteem issues because of you.” My self-esteem issues are still a problem, but they’re better, so there’s no point in going there.
Asher reaches for my hand and threads his fingers with mine. He steps close, until we’re toe to toe and tilts his head down to look me in the eye. “I’m a dick, but I’m trying, Ellie.”
I glance over to the senior parking lot and scan it for Liam's car. From the looks of things, he's already gone for the day. If Liam were thinking about anybody but himself, he would have offered me a ride home but, as usual, I am forgotten. I look back at Asher, feeling more confused than ever. He was always supposed to be the jerk in our unorthodox trio. So why is he the one waiting for me and not Liam?
“I forgive you, I guess.”
“As for the daggers.” Asher chortles. “Those were always meant for Liam. Never you, Ellie. So...” He reaches up and tucks a strand of hair behind my ears. Tiny bolts of electricity zing from his fingers into my chest. My heart skips a beat and I realize there was never any question as to what I was going to do. “Will you reconsider that ride home?”
I take the helmet and climb onto the back of his bike, wrapping my arms around Asher’s waist. He smells good, like freshly sprayed cologne. I close my eyes and breathe him in. I’m treading on dangerous waters, making a deal like this, but I’ll pay the price. Asher hasn’t admitted what he wants from me, but this man always has an angle. Our arrangement benefits him in some way and I will figure out how.
“I should probably get used to this thing.”
“Oh?” he asks. “And why is that?”
“Because no one is going to believe I’m your girlfriend if I’m scared to ride with you.” My stomach drops. Asher’s girlfriend, not Liam’s. Lord, I hope I’m not making a mistake.
Asher looks over his shoulder and smiles. “Girlfriend. Huh?”
“Fake girlfriend, but yeah.”
Asher reaches back and grips my thigh. That zing of electricity, the same one that traveled from my cheek to my chest, shoots to my center. “Things are gonna get fun.”