I Love You, I Hate You: Part 1

Logan: You’ll eat this one. I made it. Everything is vegan. Down to the crust.

I suck my bottom lip between my teeth and shake my head, heat climbing my neck. He made me a pizza? I guess a short break won’t kill me. If I go over to Logan’s now instead of after dinner, I might actually get a full night’s rest. Our late night movie marathons this week are seriously cutting into my beauty sleep.

Me: How did you even get my number?

Logan: I bribed Sarah with naked pictures of Cooper.

I bust out laughing and lean back against the headboard. I knew Sarah had a crush on Cooper in middle school. Didn’t realize she still had one.

Me: You’re disgusting.

Logan: Come on, Dani. It’s getting cold.

Me: Fine. Give me a minute.

Logan’s standing on the front porch waiting for me as I cross the grass from our yard into his. I run my hands down my faded skinny jeans. I don’t know why I’m nervous. It’s just Logan. I didn’t need to spend ten minutes finding the perfect outfit and then five minutes in the bathroom fixing my hair. But I want to look good for him.

Logan reaches for my hand and pulls me into a bear hug. You’d think we haven’t seen each other all week by the way he’s acting, but that’s not the case.

Gunner hasn’t been to school the past few days, which means I haven’t had the opportunity to formally break up with him. Tad says he’s home with strep throat. Rachel says mono, which is probably closer to the truth since Melody has been out sick too. So, while he’s been out, I’ve played the dutiful girlfriend.

Sitting at their lunch table.

Smiling and nodding when people ask if I’ve been to check on Gunner or if I miss him.

Buying my time until tomorrow night’s game.

Gunner may be a dick for taking a bet out on me, but he needs a real break up. Not rumors about Logan and I getting together behind his back. They have enough beef and I don’t plan on adding to it.

Logan, of course, is not happy, but says he understands. More so because those rumors will hurt my reputation more than Gunner’s. So, Logan has sat with Cooper and Piper every day this week. Skipped the classes we have together. And overall acted like I didn't exist in the hallways.

Just like before.

After school, though, is a completely different story. We’ve fallen into a routine, simply out of happenstance. I do my homework while Logan is at practice, cook dinner for dad even though he’s been working a swing shift this week and I never know when he’s coming home, and then when I can’t stand to be away any longer, I knock on the Harris door.

But today is different. Today my heart skips a little faster, beats a little harder, because Logan sought me out. I’m one-hundred percent sure I’m making more out of this than it is. Piper and Cooper are working tonight, Mrs. Harris is out. Logan is probably just bored and lonely and knew I’d be coming over at some point anyway.

Try telling my heart this.

I pull back from our hug that’s teetering on uncomfortably long for two people who are supposed to be just friends, but Logan pulls me tighter against his chest for a second then let’s go.

“Come on.” He rethreads his fingers with mine and pulls me into the house. I close the door behind me and let him lead us into the kitchen. Where he pulls out a chair at the table for me, then scoots me in once I’m seated. “Can I get you something to drink?”

When I don’t immediately answer, he reaches for a glass from the cabinet and fills it with ice water, then sets it on the table in front of me. I stare at this cup, utterly confused. “Uh, Logan?”

“What’s up?” he asks, placing two slices of pizza on a paper plate. It looks amazing, all the peppers, onions, and mushrooms layered over a pesto sauce. My stomach growls, almost silencing my thoughts.

Almost.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing.” He grins. “Why?”

“You’re being chivalrous. Are you feeling okay?”

Logan laughs and sets the plate in front of me. “I’m perfect.” He pauses to take a bite of his pizza, smiling against it. “Are you coming to tomorrow night’s game?”

“Of course.”