I Love You, I Hate You: Part 1

Logan hands me a flute and then takes the other for himself. “Cheers.”

We clink our glasses together. The champagne is sweet, but not sickeningly so. I take a sip, whereas Logan tosses his glass back in one big gulp. He reaches for the neck of the bottle and refills his cup. “How much do you think something like this costs?”

I shrug. I’ve never been to a club. My guess is based on watching TV-shows and assuming they are right. “In a place like this, it's hard to say. A few hundred bucks maybe.”

Logan sips his drink this time and looks down at the mess of bodi

es crammed together, dancing and drinking. “Want to go down there?”

Not really. A club is an oversized party that’s not free, and we both know how I feel about parties. I would have rather stayed in our room. I don’t know what’s come over me lately. Maybe it's because I finally called Logan my boyfriend or maybe it’s because I said those three little words, but all I want to do is touch him. Everywhere. All the time. And I want him to touch me.

I set my drink on the table and reach for Logan’s hand. He turns, a playful grin tugging at his lips and sits on the couch again. I kick my leg over and sit on his lap. Logan’s hands find my waist and I thread my fingers through his hair.

“Places like this have cameras, baby,” Logan warns.

I’m not going to screw him although I’m sure said-cameras probably have recorded that kind of stuff before. I just want a kiss. One kiss and then we’ll drink and we’ll dance and we’ll forget everyone else in the world exists.

48

Logan

We stumble into our room, hours later. Danika heads straight for the window again, pulling back the curtains and staring out at the vast darkness of the ocean. I find the couch and kick my shoes off. My feet hurt. We ended up going down into the crowd to dance and once Danika started, she didn’t want to stop.

I lie back and rest my head against the cushions, not daring to close my eyes. If I do, the world will spin and my night will be over. I drank too much, hell we both did, because everything was free. When I see Ria again this week, I’m giving her a huge tip. Tonight was amazing.

Danika crawls onto my lap, one leg on either side of me. She smells of smoke and alcohol and somehow still of rosewater. I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her face to mine; crashing my mouth onto hers, which she willingly opens. If my head wasn’t already spinning from all the liquor, it would be from the way she’s kissing me.

I taste her desire. Feel her wetness through her paper thin panties on my leg despite wearing pants. The way she’s rocking her hips on me, I know without a doubt she can feel how much I want her too.

My hands roam her body, skirting up her stomach, across her braless chest, and eventually tugging her dress over her head. Don’t ask me when or how, but my shirt ends up haphazardly across the room too.

Danika grasps onto the back of my neck and sucks on my bottom lip. My mind fogs, lust and desire swirling in it. I moan into her mouth and cup both of her massive tits with my hands.

Danika’s head drops to my shoulder, a soft “Jesus” leaving her lips.

I lift her nipple to my lips, swirling my tongue around the taught nub while sucking. She moans again. Arching. Digging her nails into my arms. My head is buzzing, pulse pumping blood to my cock. Too much more of her grinding on me and I’m going to explode like a pre-teen with his first hard on. “I need a minute.”

“Stop talking,” Danika’s mouth brushes against my earlobe. Her warm wet lips send a jolt straight to my pants. “Stop thinking. I want this. I want you Logan. All of you.”

In one swift motion, I lift her and lay her back on the couch. I kiss her slowly, devouring her lips. Cherishing this moment and committing it to memory. Danika hooks her legs around my waist while simultaneously dropping my pants and boxers to my ankles. I pull back, looking her dead in the eye. We’ve had a lot of big moments in the past twenty-four hours. Boyfriend. I love you. While I’m dying to screw her, sex doesn’t have to be thrown into the mix just yet. “We don’t have to do this, you know.”

Danika cups my cheeks in both hands. “I know, but I need you to satisfy the ache rippling through me. Please.”

I nod, kissing her quickly. Danika sits up onto her elbows and watches me walk across the room to my duffle bag. I open the new box of condoms I bought—just in case—and rip one free of its wrapper. “Do you want to move to the bed?”

Danika shakes her head and pushes her panties down to her ankles. “No. I like it here.”

I roll the rubber over my cock and lean over her again. The only time I’ve ever been the slightest bit nervous to have sex was my first time. I was fifteen, drunk and did nothing but lay there while the girl rode me. I thought about everything—football plays, cars, World of Warcraft—whatever I could to keep myself from coming in 2.5 seconds.

The nerves I felt that night are nothing compared to what I’m feeling now.

I spread Danika’s legs, feeling her shudder. “You okay?”

She nods wordlessly. I stare at her waiting for her to change her mind. We’ve never talked about how far she’s gone with guys before. I’ve never wanted to know because she’s always seemed so virginal to me. Until the last few days. “If you ever want to stop, just tell me. Okay?”

She nods again, swallowing hard.

I lift her legs onto my shoulders and slide Danika closer by the hips until my tongue kisses her warm, wet folds. She gasps, back arching at the first lick. I feel her instinctively pulling away, but I hold her in place, licking ever bit of the honey seeping out of her. Her legs shake and I can tell she’s getting closer. I pull my face back, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, then slide a finger in her.