Scorching golden eyes clashed with hers. ‘Don’t tell me what I want. You don’t know what I want.’
Lindy thought that getting married to Atreus would be wonderful—but only for a little while. Once the novelty of having a child wore off for him she would be left with an empty marriage and a husband who didn’t love her, who had once let her go even though she loved him. The pain of losing Atreus a second time would be more than she could bear, so why put herself through such an ordeal? Just for the short-lived joy of being able to call herself his wife?
‘As separate individuals sharing a child we can enjoy a mutually respectful relationship. But if we marry we will just end up getting divorced, because I’m not and will never be the wife you really want,’ Lindy told him starkly.
‘And how do you make that out?’ Atreus demanded rawly, astonished by the barrage of arguments she was employing against him.
‘Because you picked Krista Perris, who is everything I am not. She’s Greek and she’s rich and she’s doll-sized. I can’t compete and I don’t intend to even try.’ Strong pride made Lindy lift her head high, for she meant every word that she was saying. She didn’t want to be hurt again. She didn’t want to be a second-best wife, tolerated for the sake of her child. She knew her vulnerability, and was determined to protect herself from further pain and disillusionment.
‘I’m not asking or expecting you to compete with her!’ Atreus slammed back at her. ‘But I am expecting you to think of what is best for the baby you are carrying. Being a parent is about making sacrifices. It is not about what we want but about what our child needs to thrive.’
Unhappily aware from his words that he was not even able to pretend that she might have gifts equal to Krista’s in other fields, Lindy nodded stonily. ‘Lecture over? I know all about sacrifices. I spent the first four months of my pregnancy being sick at least once a day. I’ve lost my figure. My clothes don’t fit any more. I get so tired I’m in bed by ten most nights. I can’t do physical things I used to take for granted.’
Atreus reached down and closed his hands over hers to tug her upright. ‘I get the picture—I was insensitive,’ he conceded in a raw, driven undertone. ‘But I assumed that you would want to marry me. Was that so arrogant?’
The tears that came so easily to her eyes since she had fallen pregnant almost overflowed. The appeal in his hot golden gaze went straight to her heart. Angrily blinking back the moisture in her eyes, she lifted a hand and smoothed the stubborn angle of his jaw in a soothing gesture. ‘No. If I hadn’t been pregnant, if you had asked me six months ago, I would have been ecstatic. But that time has gone, and we can’t get it back because everything has changed. A divorce would be much more traumatic for our child.’
‘I just might make a bloody good husband!’ Atreus bit out in furious reproof.
‘With the right woman, yes. But that woman,’ Lindy framed unsteadily, ‘isn’t me. I wouldn’t fit in. I couldn’t be what you want and you’d end up hating me.’
Strong arms banding round her, Atreus stared down into her earnest blue eyes and kissed her with all the unstudied intensity of a man fed-up with talking. Utterly unprepared for that radical change of approach, Lindy quivered in feverish shock from the moist dart and dance of his tongue, her breath catching in her throat as an earthquake of response flooded her all too willing body. He slid a hand below her top, flipped loose her bra and closed his fingers round a firm breast with a growling sound of satisfaction that reverberated through his deep chest. With the fingers of one hand she clung to his shoulder, leaning on him while he stroked her throbbing nipples. Excitement was running amok through her sensation-starved body until her imagination jumped ahead a few minutes, to the moment when she would have to surrender her clothing. The thought of lying on her bed like a beached whale while Atreus became much too closely acquainted with her new barrel-like measurements was sufficient to make Lindy pull hurriedly away from him.
She vanished into the cloakroom at speed, to set her clothing to rights and to tell herself off for acting like a wanton hussy. Was it any wonder that he couldn’t recognise the meaning of the word no when she threw it at him?
Dragging herself back out of cover to face him again was a huge challenge, but, pink with embarrassment, Lindy returned to the living room.
Atreus dealt her a slow, sensually assessing look from smouldering dark golden eyes. ‘We could finish this dialogue in bed…’
Lindy froze.
‘I can’t think why you look so shocked. That was where we were heading until you took fright.’