“Right here, sir.”
Slowly, he shook his head. “No, Cora. You’re definitely not here.”
Over his shoulder, the world spun before she caught sight of Master Kyler. He’d taken a few steps forward, standing only a few feet away. His arms were folded as his gaze was locked onto her, making her feel small. Then she spotted Master Dmitri sitting in a chair with his elbows on his legs as he also watched her intently. Porter was in a similar position.
Cora battled against the swell of emotion, catching her breath. Fuck!
Master Aidan closed in on her. He had his emotions in check. “Cora, we’re done.”
The spinning world slowed down as the air evaporated from the room. “Done, sir?”
His posture was stiff, muscles rigid, and his neck was corded. He moved in behind her, and with a tug Cora’s hands came free. The falling of the rope to the ground made her heart fall right along with it.
No!
Nausea clenched Aidan’s stomach. Every plan he’d made, every hope he’d had, meant nothing. In the days since he’d seen Cora, something had changed. It wasn’t for the better.
He’d never believed Cora could look weaker than she had that first night he’d noticed her pain. Whatever was bothering her had gotten to a point that his pride held no restraint against the truth.
Kyler was right—Aidan was the problem.
The moment Cora had entered Club Sin, he’d seen her cautious eyes, and the dark circles resting beneath him. At first he’d wondered if she had a few rough days at work. It had happened before. But the longer the scene went on, the more guarded she became.
Once naked, and ready to play, Cora had begun shaking. Her eyes had widened and she had paled. Through the last fifteen minutes of simply watching her and fighting to understand her headspace, he’d drawn all focus onto her, not to misread her reactions.
Within minutes of their interaction, a bigger problem presented itself. She recoiled from his touch. Never, not once in the time he had trained her, and even after a punishment, when it’d been expected, had she rejected him.
He fought to make sense out of what happened between camping and now, but he had enough insight to know she was in serious trouble. As the rope dropped to the ground, sounding much heavier than it should have, all the strength drained from his body and a sense of failure made him sick.
The longest second of his life went by before Cora turned to him. Her eyes were frantic. “No, please don’t.”
Christ, she looked beautiful. The rejection in her gaze was the ugliest thing he’d ever seen. His lungs constricted, making it hard to breathe. The pain in her eyes—he’d somehow caused that, too. His heart ached as he watched her struggle. He wanted to hold her and fix her problems. Instead, he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans.
She’d showed him tonight his touch didn’t help, it hurt.
He softened his voice to keep their conversation private. “You’re not in the right headspace.”
“Master Aidan …” She shook her head, blinking. It never returned life to her empty gaze. “No, please don’t do this, sir.”
His gut twisted. That sadness he’d first seen and hoped he could fix fucking ruined him. “I can’t play with you like this.” He took a step back, shutting down any connection. “I won’t.”
She raised her wrists, offering them for his rope. “Sir, no, please, I’m fine. Sorry, I was thinking there …”
His breathing became restricted at her begging. He didn’t know what he had done wrong. And he surely didn’t want a submissive begging when, in fact, she loathed his touch. “You’re safe-wording.”
“I’m not.” Her lip quivered, voice trembling. “I never said the club’s safe word, Dragon.”
“You don’t have to say it with your voice.” He clenched his fists in his pocket, ignoring his desire to gather her in his arms. He forced himself to remember that his touch was the worst thing for her. Whatever he’d done, it had damaged the trust between them. He couldn’t help her now, but he could prevent it from getting worse. “Your body is screaming it at me.”
“No, sir, that’s not true,” she whispered.
Seeing that misery in her features fucking destroyed him. He took a step forward, craving to hold her until she only felt loved. Then he froze. Don’t touch her. “I don’t know what I’ve done …” He hesitated, choosing his words carefully. “As much as I wanted—and hoped—that I could help you, we seem to be at an impasse, Cora.”
Aidan had thought that night camping together had been wonderful. He’d thought about it ever since, and smiled every time at the memory. “When you cried in my arms … I assumed it changed things …” The tightening of his chest and quivering of his muscles forced his mouth closed.
“It did.” Her voice cracked as she continued to hold out her wrists. “But I …”
Aidan’s heart sank, and he couldn’t hear any more. He didn’t want to accept that as her Dom he had failed her. Nor could he admit that he’d crushed the trust. Everything he lived for, all the morals that made him who he was, shattered. “I’m not giving you what you need, Cora.”