without her, but he hadn’t forgiven himself. He couldn’t begin to understand what he needed to do to make that happen. To admit his weakness broke the very foundation of his Dom instincts.
Though, maybe that’s exactly what he needed to do: admit that he had failed.
Aidan sighed, placing the photo album back into the box. He placed all his memories of Lily on the floor. He wouldn’t put those items back in the closet. It was time for him to face everything he’d ignored.
His muscles tensed as he reached for his phone on the nightstand. He texted Kyler, You up?
Kyler’s reply came a second later: It’s Saturday—why are you texting me this early?
Up for a climb?
Pick me up in twenty.
Two hours later, Aidan took in a blue sky that didn’t have a cloud in sight. The air smelled clean and fresh, even if the dry humidity tightened his lungs. In the well-known climbing spot at Mount Charleston, the sandstone pressed against his chest as he climbed the rock face.
When he reached the next ledge, he clipped into the silver bolt. The climbing rope held snug as he maneuvered his way up the rock. Though his muscles burned and sweat covered his body, he welcomed the exertion.
Aidan needed to shed the angst invading him. His chest had never been so heavy and his head so murky. Squinting against the sun, he used the friction of his hand to hold his position. He examined his next move before he continued. Using his fingers, he gripped the rock above, and his legs bore most of his weight.
He paused, reaching the spot on the climb that called for a dynamic maneuver. A wide grin spread over his face. Adrenaline rushed like an energy drink into his body. He spotted the overhang above him, and he leaned against the rope, examining the rock.
Once he had the move well established in his mind, he pushed off with his feet and jumped, grabbing on to the overhang. With a grunt, his fingers wrapped around the pointed edge and he held his breath, pulling himself up. Every muscle screamed in agony, forcing him to search deep and push past the pain.
When he reached the top of the rock face, he rolled over the edge. His heart pounded in his ears as he pushed off the ground. Then he anchored the rope into the bolt on top of the cliff. With wobbly legs and sweat coating his skin, he dropped onto the edge, dangling his feet over the rock face.
He glanced down at the bottom of the cliff and chuckled as Kyler struggled to make it to the top. Aidan hadn’t picked an easy rock to climb—why would he? Kyler deserved some pain for the conversation the other night that Aidan hadn’t stopped thinking about. Still, Aidan hadn’t been too hard on him, since he knew he deserved Kyler’s wrath, steering him to climb the right side, since it was easier.
Ten minutes later, Kyler reached the top and he pulled himself over the edge. “Bastard.” His gray T-shirt was soaked in sweat, and even his black cotton shorts stuck to his legs. “Easy climb my fucking ass, you prick.”
Aidan couldn’t fault Kyler’s exertion; he wasn’t in any better shape. His navy blue tank top and khaki shorts were equally drenched, as was the hair under his baseball cap. He removed his hat, shaking the sweat from his hair. “You didn’t cut yourself, and you made it to the top.” He grinned. “It wasn’t that hard.”
“Bullshit,” Kyler muttered.
Aidan removed his harness, as did Kyler. After Aidan gathered the rope, he placed it and the harnesses into the backpack they’d left before their climb. With a long breath to settle the race of his heart, he returned to the edge of the rock and stared out into the forest below.
Beautiful.
Some things could be so complicated. Others, like nature, remained the simple. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back. He didn’t stress out in nature; everything went quiet and calm. There, he could always let it all go.
As the hot sun scorched his face, Aidan lowered his head. Kyler approached, offering him a beer. Aidan popped the top and took a big gulp, the crisp, cool liquid sliding easily down his dry throat.
Kyler gulped half the beer back before he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “All right. Talk.”
Aidan snorted because he’d been that obvious. Though he knew Kyler had been right about some things in their talk, he hadn’t been right about everything, which was Aidan’s fault. He hadn’t let anyone get close enough to understand. With Cora’s well-being on his mind, his pride to fight this alone no longer mattered. “You were right.”
“Yeah, I know,” Kyler said and snorted.
Aidan shook his head and grimaced at the typical Kyler answer. “You also had some of it wrong.”
Kyler leaned back on his hands, raising his brows in curiosity. “Oh, yeah, which part?”
Aidan glanced out to the forest below and a hawk soared above the treetops. “It’s not that I can’t move on from Lily and date another woman.”
“Then what is it about?”
“I failed her,” Aidan admitted.
Kyler gave a firm nod. “Ah, yeah, you did.”