Deal Breakers (Dealing with Love 1)

I bark in laughter before composing myself. “That’s not nice, buddy. And don’t say asshole.”

“Put a dollar in the jar!”

“What?” I ask. “I was just repeating what you said!”

“Doesn’t matter. Momma says you have to put a dollar in the jar when you say a bad word.”

I stand up and offer my hand. “Come on, bud. Why don’t you show me where the jar is and then I’ll make you some lunch.”

“I want peanut butter jelly!”

I smile. “My favorite.”

Thankfully, Nate dropped the subject during lunch. Later in the day we’re sitting on the couch to watch some cartoons. He lets out a big yawn about twenty minutes in and snuggles into me. “Hey, Riley?”

“Yeah, bud?”

“It’s okay if you wanna be my daddy but you have to wuv my mommy because mommies and daddies are ‘posta be in wuv. Do you wuv my mommy?”

I wrap my arm around him. “Yeah, big guy; I do.”

Nate falls asleep in my arms and I just sit there watching him for who knows how long. He’s so fucking perfect I want to cry like a girl. He looks really uncomfortable so I scoop him up and bring him into his bedroom. I don’t know if he should be napping this late in the day but I can’t bring myself to wake him. The little guy wore me out; I can’t imagine how tired he must be. I hear the door opening right as I’m leaving his room. I look down at my watch and see that Devyn’s a half hour early. I walk down the hall to greet her and pause when I enter the living room.

Jackson sets his keys on the side table. “Hey,” he says. “Where’s the kid?”

I nod my head towards the hallway. “He fell asleep. I put him down for a nap.”

We stand there in some sort of silent showdown. Neither one of us seems willing to talk to the other. Fuck, this is awkward.

I decide to be the bigger man. “Devyn’s not home. But I’m guessing you knew that already.”

He smirks. “I did. But she’ll be home soon. I was hoping to talk to you before she gets here.”

I stare at his keys. “You have a key to her place, huh?”

“Of course,” he says dismissively.

“What’d you want to talk about?” I snap.

He walks across the room and takes a seat at the small dining table. “I wanted to clear the air—man to man.”

I cross my arms over my chest. “Clear the air about what exactly?”

He sits back and crosses his ankle over his knee. “Look…I know you’re going to stick around so I figured we should get this out of the way. I know the real story between you and Devyn. I feel bad that you’ve missed out on being a dad when you clearly want to be involved. What she did may not have been right, but she wasn’t exactly thinking clearly at the time.”

I lean against the wall. “Devyn doesn’t need you to defend her. I’m not mad about it. We both made shitty decisions. What’s important is that I’m here now and I plan to stay.”

“Right,” he nods. “Well, I just thought you should know that the guilt has been plaguing her for years. She thought about finding you several times but she was afraid you’d reject the kid. He means everything to her and she was terrified that you wouldn’t react how she wanted you to.”

“It’s a moot point now,” I say. “I love Nathan. And she knows that. She also knows that I’m going to be the best damn father I can possibly be.”

“I understand,” he says. “That’s why I wanted to make sure there wasn’t any animosity between us. Let’s face it; this could be very awkward.”

“Could be?” I scoff.

Jackson is oblivious to my sarcasm. “Anyway, I wanted to thank you.”

“Thank me for what?”