When Constellations Form (Light in the Dark 4)

I’m kind of scared to go back outside actually—in case the smell of the food makes me sick again.

But I know I can’t avoid food for nine months … or well, I guess it’s seven now.

Holy fucking shit—that’s crazy to think about.

In seven months I’ll have a kid.

A real, live, eating, breathing, sleeping, pooping, and puking baby.

I’m so not ready for this kind of commitment in my life.

People joke that it’s eighteen years, but it’s a life sentence.

“Hey,” Xander murmurs, stepping away from the wall and grabbing my arms. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” I lie.

He raises a brow. “Don’t lie to me, sweetheart. Something’s bothering you.”

I exhale a heavy breath. “It’s just scary, that’s all.” It’s the same thing I’ve already said a million times over. I’m terrified of this whole thing. Xander says nothing’s going to change, but for once he has to be wrong. How can a baby not change things?

He cups my cheeks in his large hands, my face nearly swallowed whole.

“I’m scared too. This is a big change, but I know it’s going to be okay.”

“How?” I practically whine. “How do you know?”

He shrugs his massive shoulders. “I just do. We’re not tasked with more than we can handle. This has happened for a reason.” He moves his hand to my stomach.

I close my eyes, ducking my head as I exhale a shaky breath. I’m moments away from crying.

He grabs my chin and forces me to look up at him. “You’ll see,” he murmurs softly, his eyes flicking down to my lips. “This is a good thing, Thea. I know it is.” He cups the back of my neck and presses his forehead to mine. “You’re going to be the best mom.”

I wet my lips with my tongue. “How can that be true when I have no idea what I’m doing? I don’t even know how to change a diaper,” I cry, laying my palms flat against his shirt.

He chuckles, the sound laced with amusement. “I’ll teach you.”

“You shouldn’t have to teach me,” I whine. “You’re the guy. I should be the one teaching you.”

His lips tip up into a crooked smile. “Since when have we ever done anything the normal way?”

“True,” I agree reluctantly. I sigh heavily and rest my head on his solid chest. I hear his heart thump against my ear and my eyes close. I already feel better. Something about the sound of his heart always manages to calm me. It’s my favorite sound in the world.

“We’re going to figure this out. One step at a time.”

He lowers his head and brushes his lips over mine. The kiss starts out soft, just barely a press of lips, but then it grows more urgent. Both of us yearning for more. My hands scale his chest, seeking purchase around his neck, and his fingers press into my waist.

I let out a little sound and he swallows it with a groan, backing me into the wall.

“Hey, Mom wants to know—whoa!”

We jump apart like two kids caught doing something they’re not supposed to.

“Well,” Xavier chuckles. “I know now why I’m becoming an uncle so young. Bravo.” He claps.

My cheeks flame and I duck my head against his chest. Normally, I would come out with something flippant but I’m going to blame my sudden shyness on another side effect of pregnancy.

“Anyway,” Xavier continues. “Mom wanted to know if you felt well enough to come out or wanted to stay in here?”