I know we still have the whole summer left, and things might change, but right now I’m happy and I think … I think I’m in love with him. When you already love someone so deeply it doesn’t take long to take that plunge. It still scares me, though. Loving someone this much is only setting you up to be destroyed.
Xander’s hands move back up my sides and he cups my breasts.
All thoughts leave my mind in that moment, and all that exists is him, me, and the emotion welling in my chest.
He lowers his body over mine and kisses me. The pressure of his lips is nearly bruising, but I love it.
His hands make a slow journey down my sides and one hand moves dangerously close to the point where I ache for his touch the most. He pulls back slightly, his eyes searching mine, and I beg silently for him to touch me.
His tongue slides out to moisten his lips and he swallows thickly, looking me over as I lie across his bed. I wonder if he’s thinking the same thing I am—that I thought we’d never end up at this point. I know we had sex in Vegas but that was far different. Here, where we live, where the reminder will cling to the sheets not just in the morning but always, it means more.
My hips buck, seeking his fingers that are still right there but impossibly far away at the same time. My whole body is tight with the need for release. I haven’t ever felt this worked up before, and he’s not even touching me yet. I’m terrified that as soon as he does I might go off.
He bites his lip and the muscles in his stomach jump.
A moment later, he sinks to his knees and I’m about to ask him what he’s doing when his mouth latches onto me.
Oh, that’s what he’s doing.
My eyes nearly roll back into my head from the sensation. My legs move restlessly and he places his hands on my knees, keeping me still.
My heart thunders in my ears as his tongue traces circles around my clit. I’m pretty sure it’s about to beat right out of my chest. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s flopping around on the floor right now, wondering how it got there.
His tongue moves in a rhythm that has my hips lifting from the mattress, begging and pleading for more. His name leaves my lips in a breathless whisper and my fingers delve into his damp hair. I need to hold onto something so I don’t fall apart into a million pieces.
He sucks on my clit, the pressure just right, and then I do fall apart. My body shakes and he moves up, holding onto me. His breath is ragged, his lips pinker than normal.
I reach up, cupping his stubbled cheeks in my hands. With each breath I inhale, my breasts touch his chest. “I think you might kill me,” I whisper.
His chuckle vibrates through his body. “You’re tougher than that.” He kisses me then, stealing the little breath I have left.
Even though I just found release, my body is begging for more. So much more.
“Please,” I beg against his lips. “I need you inside me.”
And that’s exactly how I feel at this point. It’s a need, not a want. I need it more than I need air to breathe. I need to feel him on me, in me, moving above me, branding himself on my heart and soul.
I reach between us and wrap my hand around the base of his cock, slowly stroking upward. He hisses between his teeth, ducking his head into the space where my neck meets my shoulders.
He pulls away roughly and fumbles with the drawer to his nightstand.
A moment later, I hear the sounds of foil ripping.
I watch as he rolls the condom on and flicks his head to the side to keep his dark hair from falling in his eyes. He grabs my hips and slides me closer to him, positioning himself at my entrance. His eyes meet mine in the darkened room, and he’s looking at me, not for confirmation that this is okay, but instead like he’s taking a mental picture of this moment—like he too wants to remember every detail.
He guides himself inside me and I clench around him. I grab onto his back, my fingernails digging into his skin, but he doesn’t protest.
He holds onto my hips and pulls out slowly, then slowly back in. I’m desperate for more, but I feel like we need to take it slow this time.
He lowers his head and his hair brushes against my forehead and his nose rubs against mine. His lips meet mine a moment later and I kiss him back with fervor. My skin is heated and it’s not just from the friction. It’s from the overwhelming feelings welling inside me.
His hands move to cup my breasts once more, his thumbs rubbing against my pebbled nipples. My hips move against his, our rhythm evenly matched.
He presses kisses down my neck and over my breasts. My head falls to the side and he quickly grasps my chin, forcing my gaze back to his. My breaths leave me in short pants and sweat slicks my skin. I press my hands to his chest, sliding them down his abs, and hooking them around his hips, pushing him more fully into me.
He bites my bottom lip and I moan. My fingers delve into his hair and my tongue tangles with his.
He wrenches his lips from mine and pants, “You have no idea. No fucking idea.”