“Shut up.” I push his shoulder and stand.
My dad comes down the hall from his office and glances from me to Xavier, who’s still sitting on the floor. He shakes his head and mutters, “I don’t want to know,” before heading into the kitchen.
“Come on, little bro.” I hold my hand out to Xavier.
He avoids my hand and stands on his own. “You know I hate it when you say that.”
“Which is exactly why I keep saying it.”
He sighs. “So, what’s up with you?” I ask him. “Ready for Yale?”
Xavier doesn’t act like it, and it’s not something he likes to talk about, but the kid is practically a genius. Prestigious universities clamored to get him and he’s so uninterested in it all. I think all he wants to do is play video games. He finally decided on Yale, but I don’t know how excited he actually is to attend.
He shrugs. “Eh, it’s just college.”
“It’s Yale. That’s a big deal.”
“It’s still just a school,” he counters. He sighs and stuffs his hands in his pockets. “It’ll be weird being so far away from home, but I think I need the change.”
“I’m going to miss you.” It’s the truth too. The kid might be annoying as fuck, but I actually kind of like him.
“Don’t go getting all sentimental on me, Xander. It’s weird.”
I shake my head. “Maybe I won’t miss you that much.” I laugh and we finally join everyone else in the kitchen.
The meal is almost done, so my mom has Xavier and me set the table. We only manage to break one plate so I take that as a win. My mom, not so much. When she sees the broken plate, she presses a hand to her chest and mutters, “Not again. So many plates lost over the years.”
I make a mental note to buy my mom a new set of plates to make up for all the ones we broke.
“I thought Cade and Rae were coming?” my mom asks as we carry the food to the table.
Right on time, the door opens. “Speak of the devil,” my dad says and leaves us to greet them.
I inhale a deep breath. I suddenly don’t feel ready for this dinner.
We place the food in the center of the table and take our seats.
Cade and Rae enter the room and stop to say hi to my mom. Cade doesn’t even look at me, and maybe it shouldn’t, but my blood boils.
Stay calm, Xander. It’s one fucking dinner. You can do this.
The problem is it’s not one fucking dinner. It’s so much more.
Thea finds my hand beneath the table and gives it a reassuring squeeze.
Idle conversation is made as we shovel food onto our plates and I contemplate when the best time will be to tell them about football.
I rub my hands on my jeans. My palms are suddenly sweaty.
The door opens again and I hear my sister call, “I’m late, but I’m here!”
She breezes into the room, her dark hair spilling out of the up-do she has it in and her work clothes are ruffled like she’s been in a hurry, which I’m sure she has been to get here in time. She taps my head and Xavier’s as she passes and then hugs our mom and dad before taking her seat.
Thea glances at me as Alexis piles food on her plate. Her look tells me she thinks it’s time to spill the beans. I haven’t eaten that much, but what I have sits like a lead weight in the middle of my stomach.
I take another bite of macaroni and cheese but I don’t taste it.
Breathe in. Breathe out.