It was a promise he couldn’t keep, but I appreciated the gesture nonetheless.
He pulled back a little, holding onto my arms with his hands, and lowered his head so he could peer into my eyes. “Are you okay now?”
I nodded slowly. “I’m okay,” I echoed. Now that you’re here.
“Come on,” he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and guided me to the Jeep. My body still seemed numb and when he saw that I didn’t possess the energy to climb into the vehicle he helped me inside.
I felt like I was disconnected from my body. Here, but not. I kept replaying what had happened over and over in my mind—but the outcome was always different as I imagined the various ways Icky Guy could’ve hurt me. Things could’ve been so much worse than they were. I could’ve become one of those stories you hear about on the news.
Once in the vehicle Cade cranked up the heat and reached over, giving my knee a reassuring squeeze.
“I’ll deal with you later,” he hissed at Thea. He sounded like a father scolding his child and disappointment laced his tone.
Thea didn’t reply. I was glad. I didn’t want to hear her voice.
Cade started to pull out of the parking lot, but his headlights flashed over a man leaning against the side of the building smoking a cigarette. It was him. My body stiffened and I whimpered. Cade noticed and slammed his foot on the brake, which shoved all of us forward.
“Is that him?” He asked. “That’s him, isn’t it?”
He didn’t wait for me or Thea to reply. He was out of the vehicle in one lightning fast move. I watched, frozen, as he ran up to the guy. He must’ve yelled something, because Icky Guy looked up and then Cade’s fist slammed into the side of his face.
The guy fell to the ground, his cigarette forgotten, as he clutched the side of his face.
Cade bore down on him and hit him again and again.
“Oh my God,” Thea gasped from the backseat, “he’s going to kill him.” I heard the seatbelt click undone and then she slipped out of the car after Cade.
She grasped her brother’s arm, pulling as hard as she could. She finally got his attention and pointed at the vehicle. No, not at the vehicle, at me.
Cade shoved his fingers through his hair and nodded.
They got back in the car and Cade sped out of the parking lot, his jaw clenched tightly.
I leaned my head against the cool glass of the window and closed my eyes.
I wanted to pretend that tonight didn’t happen—to erase it from my memory with one swipe of my fingers over the delete button.
I’d tried that once before, but memories have a way of haunting you for the rest of your life. They don’t just go away. They become a part of you—an essential element of your make up.
fifteen
I cracked my eyes open on Sunday morning to find Thea standing above me with a tray of breakfast food. After last night I hadn’t bothered to get up and run this morning. When I woke up at five I promptly went back to sleep, muttering, “Screw it.”
“What are you doing?” I rubbed my eyes free of sleep and glared at Thea.
“Well,” she frowned, “I’m trying to apologize for last night.”
“I think you did that with the thousand and one times you told me you were sorry.” I sat up¸ stretching my arms above my head.
Thea sat the tray in my lap and then proceeded to perch on the end of my bed.
“Yeah,” she frowned, looking forlorn, “but I didn’t think you forgave me.”
She had that right. “No, I didn’t.”
Tears pricked her eyes. “You have no idea how sorry I am, Rae. I was selfish by running off and leaving you alone. It was stupid of me. I can’t take back what I did, but I want you to know that I feel awful.” She swiped at a tear coursing down her cheek.
I swallowed thickly. I didn’t want to fight with Thea. “You’re forgiven.” She brightened at my words. “But don’t you dare try to get me to go out some place like that ever again.”