“Fine.” I lifted the covers, moving my legs over to edge of the bed.
“What are you doing?” He rushed to grab me.
“If we’re going to argue, I need to be at eye level with you, and since you won’t sit, I’ll stand!” Or, at the very least, fucking try, I thought, pushing my arm out to brace myself as I tried to stand.
“For the love of God.” He sighed, sitting down, and shook his head at me. “Why are you so damn stubborn?”
“Have you ever met a lawyer who wasn’t stubborn?”
He frowned, and looked at me, while I tried to speak as calmly as I could, “Levi, you are at the top of the pyramid. Right now, you’re about to go defend the governor’s wife. I understand, I hear. But hear me. You aren’t seeing it from every angle. Shelve our previous conversation, and remember that just because you love me, and I always will love you, that career-wise, we are not on the same level. I’m at the bottom of the pyramid. I’m fresh out of school, and you made me first chair for Rita Gibbs.”
“And people thought that was favoritism?” He inhaled, fighting to keep his voice down too. “I knew you’d win and you did. Plus, you being pregnant was—”
“Was part of the strategy of winning. I know.” I got him. I got us. But it also didn’t help me. “But how did you know I could do it, Levi? You were my professor for a year. Fine. I shadowed you during that time. Fine. Atticus also got to first chair a case. I know. But they aren’t seeing me as lawyer. They don’t think I’ve earned it. They think that, once again, I’m using my body or something other than my brain and skill to win. Don’t you remember how cutthroat it is fresh out the gate? Everyone is trying to get to the top. To prove themselves, to have name recognition, and respect. To be like you, Levi! Even me. I’m still battling people. You told all the new associates there were four slots for the six of us. They hate me because they know you aren’t going to fire me. So I can’t earn respect. People are either buttering me up or talking behind my back. If I take off more than twelve weeks, when I go back … Levi, you might as well just make me your secretary. No,” I paused, remembered Betty, “you might as well make me Betty’s assistant.”
His gaze softened, and I’m sure he understood that part at least. He rubbed his forehead, not sure what to say. We sat in awkward silence. Not for long, though, when there was a knock at the door.
“Come in.” Levi stood again.
Selene stuck her head in slowly, and then opened the door wider. “It got quieter so I figured everything was good now?”
Levi grabbed his jacket and his files, coming over to me and with a kiss, his hand on my stomach. Selene moved to the side, leaning against the door, when he approached.
“If you need anything—”
“Totally have that covered,” she replied, lifting the bag of snacks and smiling at him.
He nodded and looked back at me. “I’ll call you before the trial.”
“Good luck.”
He didn’t reply like he usually did, which hurt. He just walked out and Selene stuck her head in, waiting for him to leave. Once he left, she rushed over and jumped onto his side of the bed.
“Pop or Kettle.” She lifted the bags for me to see.
“Kettle.” I pouted, taking the bag from her and ripping it open. “Was I hard on him? He just wanted me—”
“Exactly … he wanted,” she said, opening her popcorn. “Not what you wanted. And what you want is important.”
I looked over to her, really taking in the woman now sitting in front of me. Selene was a rainbow, completely different than how she was a few years ago. Her brown hair had finally grown out into thes
e soft curls. Her curls stopped at her shoulders, kind of like mine did when I let it out naturally. If only had time and half the talent she did for styling. Her fashion had also changed. Gone were the greys, blacks, and burgundies, and now you could always see her coming from a mile away, dressed in bright yellows. Her brown face was always glowing. I nearly cried at the pink dress she’d worn last week.
“What?” she asked, stuffing her face with popcorn.
“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” I told her. “I’m really proud of you.”
She paused sitting up and crossing her legs. “Thank you. I’m happy you are, but … remember, I’m your sister, not your kid.”
“Of course—”
“I’m not trying to be mean,” she said quickly. “And I’m not trying to say anything you said is wrong…I mean…I’m not a kid anymore, Thea, you can count on me. I’m your sister, not your daughter, meaning you can burden me with your problems. If not, I don’t want to talk about what’s going on with me with you.”
“What’s going on with you?” I sat up, facing her, and she made face at me. “I’m coming off mom-ish again?”
She nodded, picking up my kettle corn and handing it to me, before continuing to eat hers.
“Fine? How about…” I tried to think of the way Bethan spoke to Levi. “Please tell me your life is much more interesting than mine?”