Puck Drills & Quick Thrills (CU Hockey 5)

Beck turns. “Excuse me, that’s Assistant Coach Asshole. I’m your superior now and shit.”

“And shit is right,” Rossi mumbles.

I nod at him. “Get back out on the ice.”

He mock salutes me. “I’ll come out too. Where are we going? McIntyre’s?”

My shrug is not as nonchalant as I want it to be. “Sure.” Though what will Jasper think when I turn up with one of my players, plus two others who were on my roster last year? At least Beck and Jacobs have graduated and moved on. Going out with this year’s team captain and two other twenty-two-year-olds … At least they’re closer to my age than Jasper is, so it can’t be too bad.

Right?

When the three of us walk into the bar after practice, I’m wrong. Because this is weird.

And my gaze darts around the place, hoping Jasper can’t see. Or that they’ve already left. On the first pass, I don’t see him or Dave, but then I spot them at the bar ordering drinks.

I slink behind Rossi.

Jacobs is already at a booth, and Beck slides in next to him and kisses him hard like he hasn’t seen Jacobs in forever.

“Don’t you two live together?” I ask and take the seat opposite, sliding in after Rossi.

“They do,” Rossi says, “but they still haven’t got the hang of public displays of affection.”

“I dunno,” Beck says, “I’d say we handle it well.” He kisses Jacobs again until Jacobs pushes him away.

“Good to know,” I say.

Beck stands. “I’ll get the first round.” He disappears, leaving me with Jacobs and Rossi, who are silently staring at me and making me feel uncomfortable.

“What?” I ask.

“Sorry,” Jacobs says. “This is weird. You were our coach last year, and—”

“You’re still my coach,” Rossi adds.

I tilt my head toward him. “To be fair, you invited yourself to tag along.”

“I heard drinks.”

I snort and shake my head. “Jacobs, what are you up to now? I remember Beck saying you’re doing physical therapy?”

“Yeah, in Burlington. Then I go home to Dorset most weekends while Beck’s with the team so I can help out on my family’s farm. It’s just until Beck and I can get this hockey camp up and running.”

“Coach Hogan told me of your idea, and I think it’s amazing. If you want any help or some NHL endorsements, I could ask around my old team.”

Jacobs’s face lights up. “Really? I mean, we have Montreal to back us up thanks to Grant, but it would be awesome to have some Boston faces too.”

“No problem at all. Hockey is an expensive sport to get into but opens so many opportunities for college. Helping those who can’t afford it is an adventure I’d love to get behind.”

When Beck gets back, he’s carrying a tray of … shots.

This sight a year and a half ago was my usual. Now the sight of them makes me think about getting up early tomorrow to get the kids to school.

Fuck my life. I take a shot and swallow it down.

I’ll only have two. Then I can still drive home.

The other three down more than I can count in fifteen minutes.

Maybe it’s the break I’ve had from all the partying, or my responsibilities, or the fact I can’t stop looking over at Jasper’s table, but these guys make me feel old.

No, not old. I’m twenty-eight. I know that’s not old.

But I’m quickly realizing there’s a big difference between twenty-two and twenty-eight. Rossi talks about moving to Boston for grad school and getting a job in the city when he’s done. Beck and Jacobs have these big plans for their hockey camp. They’re amazing future plans, but they make me realize my future is now.

When my siblings are all grown and out of the house, I’m still going to be coaching. That was my endgame for when my NHL career ended. So essentially, I’m in the position I will be professionally until I retire at an old age.

Sure, I hope to become a head coach someday. Possibly to an NHL team. But I’d be happy to stay at the collegiate level too and hopefully mold my students into the type of players the NHL wants. That would be fulfilling as well. But essentially … this is my new normal.

I like it, but it also makes me look at these three young and carefree guys with envy. The world is at their feet, and they can do whatever they want.

“We should hit Sputies after this,” Beck says.

A nightclub?

Oh, I am definitely too old for this. “Uh, sounds great, but I need to get home. You know, kids have school in the morning.”

“Oh, right,” Beck says. “You’re, like, a parent.” He shudders. “Thank fuck I can’t get Jacobs pregnant, that’s all I’m saying. Kids are gross.”

Jacobs laughs. “It’s cute you think that because we’re in a same-sex relationship, my mom won’t be begging for us to get married and have kids.”