“Seriously,” Des pressed, “Mandy there is one second away from swallowing your balls like an anaconda, and you still look like the world’s about to end. What’s with you, man?”
“I’m not going to swallow his balls,” Mandy said, making a face, then moving closer to me. “But I might lick your ass if you ask nicely.”
I pushed her away and stood up. “No, thanks.”
“Come on, dude. That was a solid rim job offer. Who the fuck turns down a rim job?”
Mandy looked offended, but I didn’t give a shit. She was another piece of pussy in a sea of wet cunts. I could have nearly any girl in this place without much effort and had already tasted the majority of them.
It always left me feeling empty after.
Addler came over and shoved another beer in my hands. “Ignore them. Do whatever you want, man.”
“Thanks.” I took a deep swig. Addler got me better than the other guys did. “I need to go for a walk.”
“Do what you got to do.” Addler grinned as he turned away and looked at Mandy. “Now, darling, if you’re still in the mood, I’m amenable to a three-way. You can lick my taint while pretty Becky here swallows my cock, and if you’re both very nice, I’ll fuck you senseless. How’s that for a plan?” He walked over, and Mandy had already forgotten all about me as I made my way to the bedroom door.
Des threw an empty beer can at me as I left. I let it hit the hall and splatter dregs on the hardwood floor. “Pussy!” he called out. “You’re always in such a shit mood!”
He was right and he was wrong.
Not always, but most of the time.
Des wouldn’t understand. He had been born to this sort of life. Rich, popular, shameless. He had no clue what hardship meant.
I paced my way down the steps and into the thick of things. The kegs flowed and the music blasted. There were more people around than I would’ve expected, but then again, it was the first rager of the semester. Everyone wanted to have some fun after summer break, and I was ready for them to indulge.
The drunker these fucks got, the more likely it would be that someone would fight me.
When guys were sober, they were smarter. It took a very stupid, very wasted human to stand up and throw hands with me, but that was what I needed.
A release. A true fucking release.
Nothing worked. All this anger and rage built up inside me every day and every night, and drinking and smoking could dull it, but drugs never made it go away. I always woke up the next morning hungover and still pissed as all hell.
Only pain and hurting let it all dissipate.
Breaking someone’s face. Or having my face broken. Either way, I needed blood to extinguish the constant hammering tightness in my chest.
It’d been like this ever since I’d gone to live with my cousin. The poor girl didn’t deserve the way I treated her, but I couldn’t help myself. She was so nice, so fucking sickly sweet and saccharine, and she understood better than anyone the sort of shit I’d gone through day in and day out for years under the stern and watchful gaze of her father.
She knew what that man did to me.
I tried not to let my anger leak out onto her. I gave her shit, and I was an asshole, but I never touched her. Robyn was a decent person, and even though I was a monster, I still respected that.
I gazed around, looking for the biggest, meanest, drunkest dumbass I could find. Anyone would do. I wasn’t picky. The bigger the better, though—I didn’t want this fight to end too fast.
As my eyes scanned the room, I stopped myself. The music faded, the light dimmed.
And I stared at Cora Boyle, my cousin’s best friend.
What the fuck was she doing here?
Cora came up to my chest at best. She was small, petite, with a big smile, thick black hair, and full pink lips. I’d always found her attractive, but only lately had I started to notice her—and ever since that encounter on campus when I’d nearly ripped her shoulder from its socket and she’d barely made a sound, I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her.
Pretty little Cora. Sweet Cora. She was a space cadet, like my cousin. Dorky in a sexy way.
And a notorious virgin.
Maybe she’d be a better release than fighting.
I waded through the people. More than a few greeted me, but most got the hell out of my way. They knew better than to get in front of me when I was on the warpath, and tonight, I was an invading army looking for plunder.
Cora was my target.
She stood alone near the wall sipping a beer. When she noticed me coming, her face paled, but she didn’t try to run away.