“I did.” Tears streamed down my face. They began to freeze as they dropped onto my sweatshirt. “They didn’t believe me.”
“Maybe because it didn’t happen. I’m so sorry, but I’d never do that to a child. This is all some misunderstanding. If we can sit down and talk, we can explore—”
“Do it,” I said, the rage oozing from my lips, and backed away.
I met Jarrod’s eyes. He stared back at me, a strange dispassion on his face.
“We can talk,” Dr. Silver said.
Jarrod plunged the knife into his throat.
Blood spouted out. Dr. Silver tried to say something else, but it came out a gurgle. Hoagie tore forward, ripping the leash from my hand. Jarrod jerked the knife out, jabbed it in one more time, tearing the blade free as he kicked Dr. Silver to the ground.
Blood gushed out from his body. Jarrod stepped back, gripping the bloody knife, as Hoagie danced around his owner’s dying body.
I stared at the man that haunted my dreams as he twitched and groaned and writhed, trying to staunch the bleeding.
But there was no stopping it.
I knew how he felt. He’d bleed for minutes, while I bled for years. I felt like I oozed day and night, dripping emotions, anger, rage, resentment, covering the ground with my droppings, my failures, my wrecked life. Dr. Silver looked up at me, and I saw nothing there, no absolution, no truth, no admission of guilt.
Only a scared man dying in pain.
Jarrod grabbed Hoagie and unclipped the leash. He wrapped it tight and shoved it in his pocket. The dog barely seemed to notice. Hoagie sniffed and whined, moving around Dr. Silver as he gushed his life into the dirt.
It took longer than I expected, but slowly, the bastard stopped moving, then went still.
Silence descended on the forest.
Jarrod stared down at the man he’d killed and looked bored. He knelt next to the dying man and did something—inspected his fingers maybe? I couldn’t tell because Hoagie was prancing around anxiously.
“We should go,” I said softly, looking around the woods like the cops might leap out from behind a tree at any moment.
He only nodded, stood, and walked to me.
I let him take my hand. “What about the dog?” I asked, but he was already drawing me away.
“Don’t worry. It’s a good dog. Someone will give it a good home.” We headed along the path, through the underbrush, and past the houses. The dog didn’t bark this time. There was nobody outside of the party. We reached the truck and Jarrod wrapped the knife in a microfiber cloth.
“What are you going to do with that?” I had to focus on practicalities before the truth of what we’d done settled.
“Get rid of it. Can’t risk the cops finding it.”
“You could clean the blood off.”
“Might not do a perfect job.” He shook his head and started the engine. “Let me worry about it.”
I shrugged and sank back in my seat.
It was done. Dr. Silver was dead. He’d never rape another child again.
My hands were shaking as I stared out the window.
I watched a man die. A horrible man, but still a human being.
I watched him bleed to death.
And I was part of the murder.
He’d still be alive if it weren’t for me.
What would that mean? How could I keep going now?
Not like it mattered. We did the impossible.
Jarrod parked outside of my house. He killed the engine and stared at me. I looked back, suddenly very aware of what I owed him.
My body. My virginity.
“Go inside. Tell your parents you’re tired and go straight to bed.”
“Okay, I can do that.”
“Don’t do anything you wouldn’t normally do. Lie down in bed, close your eyes, and sleep.”
I chewed on my lip. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. You’re shaking.”
I looked down at myself. He was right—I was shivering, despite the truck’s heater.
“Adrenaline.”
“Sure. Go to sleep, Cora.”
“What now? I mean, they’re going to investigate that, right?”
“Forget it ever happened. All you need to focus on is going to sleep.”
I turned away and grabbed the door handle. “I know what you want from me,” I said softly, not moving. “You’re going to claim it, right?”
“Yes, I am.” His fingers brushed the hair on my neck. “Our deal isn’t nearly finished. But you don’t have to think about that right now.”
I closed my eyes. “Go inside. Go to sleep. I can do that.”
“Goodnight, freak.”
I pushed open the door and stepped out into the night.
11
Cora
I expected to roll around until sunrise. Instead, I slept a dreamless black nothing and startled awake with my alarm.
I killed it, got out of bed, and took a shower.
The water felt like it always did. My towel was the same. My room was the same.
My world hadn’t changed.
I didn’t know what I expected. Trumpets? Singing angels? Something to mark the before times and the after times.
A world with my molester and a world without him.