She drew on all her reserves as they got to the top of the steps and were greeted by officials from the hospital. They were exceedingly polite, but with a definite reserve. Kaden gave a short heartfelt speech about the new unit, which was specifically for heart disease, and then they turned towards the huge ribbon over the main doors.
Julia was handed a pair of scissors and cut it. Everyone clapped and cheered, but she couldn’t help but notice the reticence of the crowd ever since she’d appeared at Kaden’s side.
After being shown around inside by the doctors and officials they re-emerged, and Kaden led her towards the crowds. He said, “We’ll do a short walkabout. It’s expected.”
Urged forward, Julia went towards a little girl, who pushed forward shyly to hold out some flowers. She bent down and took them, saying thank you in their native language. But Julia noticed the mother pull the child back, her lips pursed in disapproval, eyes dark and hard.
Another woman who held a baby visibly turned away, and adjusted a shawl over the baby’s face so that Julia couldn’t see it. As if to protect it from her gaze. Amongst her shock at the people’s obvious rejection of her Julia felt a welling desire to have them look at her with open faces and smiles. She realised that she desperately wanted to be able to connect with them.
Kaden was taking her hand and pulling her back to the car. When they got in Julia was a little shell-shocked.
Kaden was grim as the car pulled away. “I’m sorry about that. They’re wary after Amira and my stepmother … they’ll come round.”
“It’s OK,” Julia replied faintly, feeling more hurt than she’d thought possible. She’d not even known till then how important the Burquati people’s opinion of her was. “I can understand that they wanted to see you with someone more suitable.”
Kaden was silent beside her, and Julia didn’t want to look at him and see disappointment in his second wife etched into his face.
When they got back to the palace Kaden stopped Julia and said, “I’ve got to go into the desert for a couple of days to meet with the newly elected Bedouin council.”
Julia looked at him against the backdrop of the magnificent central courtyard and felt a hollowness echoing through her. This was how it would be between them. Distance and polite civility.
She nodded. “Fine. I’ll see you in a couple of days. I’ve got lessons to get on with in the meantime.”
Julia turned away, and Kaden had an irrational urge to grab her back, throw her into the car and drive them far away. He wanted to be going into the desert with her, the way they’d used to. Sneaking off like fugitives, spending nights in a hastily erected tent under the stars. No thought in the world beyond exploring each other and sating mutual desire. And talking for hours.
An ache welled up inside him, and this time he couldn’t ignore it. He had a sudden overwhelming need for those memories not to be tainted by what had happened twelve years before. For Julia to look at him the way she’d used to, with such open love and warmth. But the reality was clear. If Julia had ever had any feelings for him they were long gone. She was bound to him for ever, and she couldn’t help but hate him for that. He’d seen the way that woman in the crowd had shielded her baby from Julia, as if she were some sort of witch. And Julia had just smiled.
With a jerky move, Kaden got back into the car which would take him to a helicopter to fly him into the desert. In that moment he’d never felt such bleakness surround him, and pain for subjecting Julia to the cold disapproval of his people when he knew just how deep her vulnerability went.
As Kaden flew over the desert a short time later the helicopter dipped abruptly for a moment in an air pocket. The pilot apologised and Kaden smiled tightly. That physical sensation mirrored exactly how he felt emotionally, and it wasn’t comfortable.
Julia spent the next two days working hard with her own secretary to encourage meetings with locals. She was determined to do what she could to bridge the gap, and wanted to avoid having any free time to brood about Kaden and the distance between them. She had to admit, though, that talking to him about her adoption had been cathartic. Thoughts of it and her birth mother no longer came with the heavy oppressive weight they’d used to.
To her delight she’d managed to set up a few coffee morning events at the palace, to meet with local women’s groups and dicuss various issues. Julia had always had an interest in the more anthropological end of archaeology, so the prospect of meeting Burquati people and coming to learn their customs excited her.
She was in the middle of her first coffee morning when she saw Kaden again, and she nearly dropped her cup. He stood in the doorway, tall and gorgeous in long robes, jaw dark with stubble. He’d obviously just returned. She could swear her heart physically clenched as she saw him again.
All the women immediately bowed and went silent.
He inclined his head. “I’ll leave you to it. I’m sure you’re discussing far more important things than I will be at my cabinet meeting later.”
He smiled, but to Julia it looked slightly strained. His eyes skated over her, giving her no more nor less attention than the other women. The awful yearning for him to acknowledge her with more than that inclusive glance nearly overwhelmed her, and she had to shove the hurt down deep.
He left, and after a moment of pregnant silence the women started chattering in a mixture of English and Burquati. Julia had been struggling to connect with the women, who’d seemed very suspicious, but suddenly they were all smiles and laughs.
Her secretary smiled at her sympathetically, misreading her anguish. “Don’t worry. It’ll just take some time.”
Julia smiled wanly and went to join in again, feeling prickly because, if truth be told, she was jealous of these women. Kaden could come and charm them so effortlessly when he couldn’t even be bothered to touch her any more!
Julia was lying in bed that night, unable to sleep. Kaden hadn’t returned to their suite all evening, and she’d eaten dinner alone. She knew she couldn’t continue like this, with Kaden holding her at arm’s length and looking at her as if she might explode at any moment like a ticking bomb.
When she heard his familiar step she tensed. He came into the moonlit room, treading quietly.
Julia came up on one elbow and said huskily, “I’m awake.”
He stopped, and all she could see in the gloom was his huge shape. Predictably, despite her tangled head and emotions, her body reacted to the sight of him. Softening, melting.
She sat up and pulled her