He hadn’t intended making love to her there and then. But she’d blasted through any resolve to resist her just by looking at him. Never mind being naked, her skin wet from the sea. Red hair in long silken skeins over her shoulders. Like a water nymph sent to tempt him. Or a mermaid.
The more he had of her the more he wanted. It made his skin prickle with a sense of panic. Exposure. The same kind of exposure he’d felt when he’d realised she had been a virgin, because he’d wanted her too much to look for the signs of innocence, and in hindsight they’d been there. He’d just ignored them.
Today had just proved her effect on him.
Dangerous.
He said, ‘We didn’t use protection today.’
Sophy’s hand tightened on the stem of the wine glass. Heat suffused her body again to think of how carnal she’d been on the beach earlier. She barely remembered Apollo putting the dress over her head afterwards, dressing her. Leading her up the steps. Putting her to bed. She’d woken in her room, alone, as the sun had been setting outside.
She’d taken a shower and come out to find Apollo sitting in the dining area, clean-shaven, hair damp, as Olympia had laid the table for dinner. For a moment she’d almost been afraid she’d dreamt up the beach, but the storm he’d mentioned was lashing at the windows now.
They hadn’t used protection. Because she’d all but begged him to make love to her.
She fought the rising tide of heat under her skin. Apollo looked at her and shook his head. ‘It’s amazing that you can still blush...’
That only made her blush even harder. ‘It’s okay... I’m at a safe place in my cycle.’
Apollo saw the worried look on Sophy’s face. She couldn’t hide her expressions. He had to acknowledge uncomfortably that he trusted her word.
‘It won’t happen again.’
Her face was still pink. Her hair was down around her shoulders. She’d appeared for dinner in long loose trousers and a loose silk top. It kept slipping off one shoulder.
The pink leached a little from her cheeks. She said, ‘I think you’re right, it’s not a good idea.’
Apollo dragged his gaze up from where her pale shoulder was bared. He frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘Making lo—’ She stopped. ‘Sex. It’s probably not a good idea. Considering everything...’
A visceral rejection of what she’d said rose up from somewhere deep and primal inside Apollo. He might have come here intending to keep his distance but after this afternoon that was an impossibility.
He shook his head and reached out a hand, finding Sophy’s across the table and tugging her up out of her chair and over to him. He pulled her down and she landed on his lap, sliding into place like a missing jigsaw piece.
It’s just desire, repeated Apollo like a mantra in his head.
He said, ‘That’s not what I meant.’
Sophy hated the way her heart leapt. ‘What did you mean?’
‘I meant that I won’t be careless again, but we will be making love again. I don’t see why we can’t make the most of this. The chemistry between us is more powerful than anything I’ve ever experienced. It’s unprecedented for me. But it will burn out. It always does.’
It will burn out. Sophy felt something inside her rebel at that assertion. This feeling that she’d never get enough of him...she couldn’t imagine it ever fading away.
As if he could read her mind, he said carefully, ‘Sophy, nothing has changed. I am not in the market for a relationship or family. It’s not something I ever want to experience. If anything, believing that I might become a father has only confirmed my vow not to have a family. I had a family and I lost them, I won’t put myself through that again.’
Sophy’s heart constricted. His words, painful as they were, actually helped to clarify how differently her very similar experience had shaped her. ‘I lost my family too...but I know I won’t feel whole again until I have a family of my own.’
Apollo tensed under her body and she held her breath. But then he said in a voice devoid of emotion, ‘And I’m sure you’ll have that one day. With someone else. What I’m offering is very transient. A couple of weeks to explore this insane chemistry before we part ways and get on with our separate lives. Once and for all.’
Sophy knew that she should stand up and step away. Tell Apollo that she wasn’t interested in a transient affair. She wanted more. She’d always wanted more. It was why she’d still been a virgin long after her sister had lost her innocence.
But Apollo wanted her for now. Maybe that was enough. Maybe she would wake up one morning and not feel this insatiable need. Maybe she would be able to move on. Could she stand up and step back...from this? This energy pulsing between them even now?
She knew the answer. No way. Memories might be cold bedfellows in the future but she knew she didn’t have the strength to walk away. Not yet. He’d been her only constant for the last few turbulent weeks. She needed to feel anchored again. Rooted. Even if it was only temporary.
She slid her arms around his neck. ‘Okay, then.’