“What did you do with them?”
Albert shrugged. “We left them. They weren’t going anywhere. They’re starved. And Quinn says he thinks maybe they’ve gone a little crazy.”
Albert picked fastidiously at a spot of something on his pants. “Caine took out Hank. Hank was the one shooting.”
“Jesus,” Astrid said. She crossed herself quickly, hoping that doing so would turn the word from blasphemy to blessing. “How many kids died last night?”
Edilio answered. “Who knows. Two that we know of in the fires. Probably others. Probably we won’t ever know for sure.” A huge sob escaped from him. He wiped at his eyes. “Sorry. I’m just tired.”
He wept silently after that.
“I guess I might as well get this out there, too,” Howard said. “A couple of kids are saying they saw Drake. And a lot have seen Brittney.”
Silence stretched after that. Astrid found a chair and sat down. If Drake was alive…If Caine was working with Zil…
“Where’s Sam?” Edilio asked suddenly, as though he’d just noticed.
No one answered.
“Where’s Dekka?” Astrid asked.
“In the basement,” Edilio said. “She kept going for a long time. Her and Orc and Jack. But she’s sick. Tired and sick. And she got a bad burn on one hand. That was it for her. I made her go to Dahra. Lana will…you know, when she’s done with…Man, I’m sorry,” he said as he began crying again. “I can’t be digging graves. Someone else has to do that, okay? I can’t do that anymore.”
Astrid realized that Albert and Howard were both staring at her, one with intense curiosity, the other with a weary smirk.
“What?” Astrid snapped. “You’re both on the council, too. Don’t look at me like it’s all up to me.”
Howard laughed grimly. “Maybe we better get John here, huh? He’s on the council, too. Sammy’s missing, Dekka’s out of it, Edilio’s losing it and he should be losing it, the night he had.”
“Yes. We should get John here,” Astrid said. It felt wrong bringing the little kid into this, but he was on the council.
Howard laughed, loud and long. “Yeah, let’s get John here. That way we can stall for a while longer. We can keep on doing nothing for just a little while longer.”
Albert said, “Take it easy, Howard.”
“Take it easy?” Howard jumped to his feet. “Yeah? Where were you last night, Albert? Huh? Because I didn’t see you out there on the street listening to kids screaming, seeing kids running around hurt and scared and choking, and Edilio and Orc struggling, and Dekka hacking up her lungs and Jack crying and…
“You know who couldn’t even take it?” Howard raged. “You know who couldn’t even take what was happening? Orc. Orc, who’s not scared of anything. Orc, who everyone thinks is some kind of monster. He couldn’t ta
ke it. He couldn’t…but he did. And where were you, Albert? Counting your money? How about you, Astrid? Praying to Jesus?”
Astrid’s throat tightened. She couldn’t breathe. For a moment panic threatened to overwhelm her. She wanted to run from the room, run away and never look back.
Edilio got to his feet and put an arm around Howard. Howard allowed it, and then he did something Astrid never thought she would see. Howard buried his face in Edilio’s shoulder and cried, racking sobs.
“We’re falling apart,” Astrid whispered for herself alone.
But there was no easy escape. Everything Howard had said was true. She could see the truth reflected in Albert’s stunned expression. The two of them, the smart ones, the clever ones, the great defenders of truth and fairness and justice, had done nothing while others had worked themselves to exhaustion.
Astrid had figured her job was to bring order out of chaos when the night of horror was finally over. And now was the time for her to step up. Now was the time for her to show that she could do what needed doing.
Where was Sam?
It hit her full force then, the shocking realization. Was this how Sam felt? Was this how he’d been feeling since the beginning? All eyes on him? Everyone waiting for a decision? Even as people doubted and criticized and attacked?
She wanted to be sick. She had been there for so much of it. But she hadn’t been the one. She hadn’t been the one making those choices.
And now…she was.