Night of the Zandians (Zandian Brides 1)

he nods and leaves, coming back empty handed. “You need sustenance, though.”

“Maybe.” I shrug. “If King Zander is going to send me away, it doesn’t much matter, though.”

Her expression drops. “He wouldn’t do that.”

I bite my lip. “I hope not. But it’s his choice.” A wave of dizziness rolls over me, and then another one, and I list in my chair, heart racing.

“Riya!” Lily is at my side in an instant. “You’re not well. I’m calling Bayla.” Bayla, Dr. Daneth’s mate, was a breeding slave before Daneth bought her. She’s works as his nurse now.

“Don’t.” I pull at her arm. “King Zander won’t want you wasting resources on a traitor like me.”

“You’re not a traitor. You just… made a mistake.” Her voice is hesitant, and I hear the conflict.

“It wasn’t a mistake.” At least I can be honest now. “It was a calculated decision. I chose not to tell them.”

She grimaces. “Can you phrase it another way, when you talk to the king?”

“I’m done lying.” I look at my tablet, but now my brain is too roiled up to focus. “It feels better to say things that are true. It’s like tearing off a scab. It hurts, but it feels so good to reveal the skin beneath it.”

“Riya.” She sits beside me. “Please let me help.”

“But you can’t.” I look at her, tears rising in my eyes. “If you can’t heal me, you can’t help me. It’s that simple. Besides, I made my own choices, bad as they are, and I need to stand behind that.”

“Your worth is not solely placed on your womb,” she snaps, suddenly mad. She touches my stomach. “Men are not judged solely by their ability to procreate. There are other ways to contribute to society. It would be a very foolish leader who does not understand that and allow for options. How can you not see that? Do you think Zander to be such a simpleton?”

“No! I don’t. I think he’s a leader who’s looking out for what’s best for his planet and his people and having a lying criminal may not be the right thing. I’ve tried. Mother Earth, how I’ve tried to make myself useful these past lunar cycles.”

“And you are,” she insists. “Don’t you see how your creations are valued? Dr. Daneth even said your salicylic acid idea may revolutionize the future of topical pain medicine for not just Zandians, but other species as well.”

My pride flashes but is doused. “But is that enough to make me worth keeping?”

“What if you were just a regular human without special skills, wouldn’t that make you worth keeping?” She touches my knee. “You helped in battle, you won your freedom, now you’re here. You’re part of this land. It’s impossible to assume that every single human will be able to have young. It’s not logical. You can’t just toss out people.”

Bayla enters the chamber. “Riya, Lily.” She nods.

I raise my hand. “Hello.”

“I hear you’re not well? You don’t look well.” She glances at me, her gaze lingering on my belly, and I flinch, as if my barren status shows in my very skin. “Come with me, to Dr. Daneth’s lab for an examination.”

I’m about to protest, but Dr. Daneth enters. His eyes are cool and assessing as he looks at me. “Come. I must examine you, Riya.” It sounds more like an order than a request.

I get up and follow them to Dr. Daneth’s examination room. Lily shoots me a sympathetic look as I leave.

Dr. Daneth attaches a soft silver clip to my finger and records some data. “Remove your clothing,” he says, his voice distant. “I need to attach these.” He holds up electrodes, and I comply, numb, as he attaches leads, takes an EKG. He grabs a blood sample with a small silver device. Nothing hurts, but I don’t know what they’re going to do with this data. Add it to my file, maybe.

Bayla presses my body, my lymph nodes, and when she reaches my belly, I recoil. “Ugh.”

“Does that hurt?” She and the doctor exchange a glance.

“I’m just upset,” I say. “And there’s a pain here.” I point to my lower abdomen. “Probably from not eating.”

“Is it sharp or dull?” she asks, pressing again. “Here?”

“Ow. Yes. Sharp, sometimes.”

Dr. Daneth repeats it, his fingers precise, locating the exact spot. “Interesting.”

“How so?” I ask, but he doesn’t answer, as he’s busy typing something into his screen.