We walk out and go to my covered lanai on the right. The brown wicker sofa with comfy beige cushions is L-shaped. It faces a stone-covered wall that has the fireplace on the bottom and the television on top of it. "What did you get?" I ask him, setting the wine down on the table in the middle, and then sit and curl my feet under me. I grab the throw blanket I have out here and wait for him to answer me. "It better be something good. I’m starving."
He sits next to me. "Before you complain, I’m going to add that you were not cooking yourself anything when I got here. So …" I glare at him as he takes out two containers. "Grilled maple salmon." I smile and clap my hands happily because he knows it’s my favorite. "With mashed potatoes and a side salad." He pulls out two more containers.
"You’re my favorite," I say, and he hands me the container. "But if you ask me that publicly, I will deny it until the bitter end." He laughs, and I look at him, grabbing his own. "I forgot forks.” I start to get up but he beats me to it. I watch him walk inside the house, and my heart feels weird in my chest.
"You know what you need?" he says, coming out and closing the door behind him. He sits down next to me, handing me a fork. I take the plastic lid off the meal. "A dog.” His eyes light up, and I look over at him.
"You know what you need?" I counter him, pointing the fork at him. "A house, and then you can get your own damn dog." He throws his head back and laughs.
"I do need my own house," he admits, grabbing his own meal. "And maybe a dog."
I look at him as I take my first bite of salmon. "You better not even think that I’m going to watch that thing when you go away. There is a line in this friendship, Cooper Grant, and pets are it."
"You would do it for me.” He is so full of himself as I glare at him as he chews his own mouthful. "Because you love me, and I would do it for you."
"Love … hate … it means the same," I say, and he chuckles. "Now, not that I don’t like when you come over and bring me dinner. Especially after not seeing you for a couple of days.” My stomach is suddenly getting tight, thinking that I haven’t seen him since Sunday. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" I ask, and the food suddenly doesn’t look appealing to me.
"Do you think I loved Julianne?" he asks softly, and I look at him.
"What do you mean?" I question and see that his eyes are on his food, so I know his mind is going a million miles a minute. "You had to have loved her to create two amazing little girls," I say and set my food on the table. "But were you in love with her?"
"Yes," he says. "That was me in love with her."
"I think at one point you truly loved her," I answer him honestly. "But people grow apart."
"I was trying to remember the last time I felt something for her." He looks over at me. "We lived together for five years. We had two children, and for the life of me, I can’t remember the one time I felt something for her."
"It’s because of all the bad stuff that happened," I remind him. "It just didn’t go bad overnight."
"Oh, don’t I know it," he says. "I know we weren’t meant to be together, and I truly want her to be happy. I just …" He rubs his hands over his face. "I called her today, and for the life of me, I couldn’t remember a time I liked her."
"I’m sure there were moments that you will remember." I scoot closer to him. "But maybe you're just so over her bullshit that you can’t see it." He laughs. "I mean that in the nicest way." I put my hand on his shoulder. "She always gave you a hard time about your family."
"She said they meddled too much, and I can see it, but they are my family. It’s the way they are."
"Then she didn’t like that you had to train year-round," I remind him. "She didn’t like the way you dressed. She didn’t like when you didn’t shave. She didn’t like how you laughed at certain things. She didn’t like your hair at one point. I mean, the list was endless with everything she wanted you to change. Toward the end, she hated everything about you. And you hated everything about her."
"You’re right. I just, you know with my family, I thought once you find the woman, it’s like bam, it’s over. I’m just asking myself what I did wrong."