Crimson Truth (Onyx Assassins 4)

“I’ll just pull the GPS locations from your phone and do it,” he countered. “No reason for you to be late for your date.”

“I should cancel. I’m needed here.” Guilt sank low in my stomach.

“You’re needed out there. A war is coming, and we’re going to need more trainees. It’s up to you guys to breed in the new generation of Assassins.” Hawke shook his head, the bones of his cheeks standing out in harsh relief. He was pushing himself to the point past exhaustion. Past sanity.

“Well, when you put it that way,” I joked, but it fell flat. “There’s no saying that the young of an Assassin will join the Order.”

He slowly lifted his eyes to mine, and the look would have been sarcastic if he didn’t look so damned gaunt. “Name one male young who did not follow his father’s steps into the Order.”

My mouth opened and shut, but I couldn’t think of a single one.

“You need to go,” Alek said from the doorway behind us.

“The timing of this is all shit.” I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “Avianna is missing. Two of the Hunters have lost their minds, the witches are plotting, and I’m what...pretending I’m the next contestant on The Bachelor?” I shook my head and started to remove my jacket.

Alek’s hand landed heavy on my shoulder. “You’re going.”

“This is—”

“Necessary,” Alek continued. “You swore an oath to your mother and you’re fulfilling it. Avianna...doesn’t want to be found.” He cleared his throat. “And there’s not much we can do about that tonight, and that includes you, Hawke.”

Hawke’s jaw flexed. “I’m going to head out here,” he pointed to an area in the lycan territory known for its caves. “Someone could have missed something.” The determined edge in his voice told me he wouldn’t be deterred.

“I’ll go with you,” I offered.

“No, the fuck you will not,” Alek snapped. “Hawke, you and I both know she’s not—”

The look Hawke sent our king would have been considered treasonous, if not an outright threat.

“She was my responsibility. Mine. So if I want to search every fucking inch of this earth, I’ll do it.” He palmed a dagger.

I shifted my position slightly, just enough to put myself between him and Alek. Hawke was as loyal as they came, but there were no lies inking themselves into my arms. He believed every word he said.

“Then take Dagon with you,” Alek finally agreed after a pause. “And you have to feed first. You look like death.”

Hawke merely grunted and strode out of the room.

“He blames himself,” I said once he was out of hearing range. “He truly believes this is all his fault.”

“He shouldn’t. We don’t live in an age where we can lock up our females for their own safety anymore. They make their own choices, and Avi made hers that night.” Alek sighed, his shoulders sagging. “If anyone is to blame, it’s me for making her feel like she had to sneak out to get a little normalcy.”

“My king—” I started.

“Don’t.” He cut me off with a wave of his hand, but his entire expression changed, softened when his mate walked into the room. “Tell Benedict he has to go on his date, my love.”

Lyric walked to Alek and turned to face me, Alek’s arms surrounding her petite frame as she looked me up and down. “Man, I wish I could get you to help Alek spruce up his wardrobe,” she teased. “You look great, Benedict.”

“Thank you.” I inclined my head in respect. “But I really think I should cancel—”

“Absolutely not!” Lyric gasped. “That poor female is probably already on her way to the restaurant! You can’t do that to her!”

I blew out a long breath.

“Go,” Alek insisted.

“There’s so much that needs to be done here.”

“Not tonight, there’s not,” he argued. “You and Jocelyn searched through a lot of territory today. She’s under Lachlan’s care upstairs, and—”

“And I’m dating?” I snapped. “What the hell is the point?”

“There is more to life than this war,” Lyric said, her hands rising to cover Alek’s. “And love, no matter how it comes to us, is sacred, and worth taking an hour or two out of the night to seek.”

“Love,” I muttered shaking my head. “I’m not looking for love.” I’d given up on that particular emotion centuries ago.

“Well you should,” Lyric argued, pinning me with a stare. “You deserve everything good. Now get out that door before I shove you out myself.”

And she would. Alek had mated a female just as stubborn as he was.

“Fine.” I put my hands up and backed away, toward the door.

“You look hot, I promise!” Lyric said with a grin.

Alek shrugged. “I probably would have gone with Armani. The Gucci is a little much for a first date, but I guess you’ll do.”

“Fuck off.”

He smile fell just short of a grin, and I couldn’t help but wonder if any of us would truly smile again until Avi returned.