Window Shopping

“I just have to ask you one thing first,” Stella says. And I look down to find her definitely gearing up for something. Almost steeling herself. “Aiden, this…wanting to be with me, isn’t about…saving me, is it? You might not even realize what you’re doing,” she rushes to add. “You might truly believe you like me. But maybe your nature demands that you care for someone who needs it. And that’s lovely, really lovely, but I don’t think that’s good for either of us.”

It takes me a moment to get past my shock. Saving her? How long has she been worried about this? “Stella, you’re going to succeed with or without me. If I didn’t give you this job, you would have found another way in, here or somewhere else. I’m grateful I was the one who gave you a shot, because it’s how we met, but you don’t need saving. Support, yes. And I need it, too. But not saving.” I pause, hoping my words are sinking in. “This isn’t about me carrying you, it’s about us walking together and deciding where to go, all right?”

She takes in a breath and lets it out slowly. “All right. Let’s sign.”

A moment later, the sound of the printer spitting out the paperwork makes me smile. I look down at Stella to see if she’s smiling, too…and find her nose buried against my abominable snowman bow tie, instead. She inhales deeply and looks up at me, pupils dilating, her teeth sinking down into her bottom lip, her chest lifting up, shuddering down on a winded exhale.

And as soon as we get these papers signed, I have a pretty damn good idea how we’ll be spending our lunch break.

13

Stella

Well. I guess it’s possible to want no one’s help and be starved for someone to believe in me—all at the same time. And I had no idea. None. Not until Aiden stormed hell for leather into the human resources office. I was such an idiot to assume he would believe I’d stolen those earrings. Such. An. Idiot. Aiden Cook is not typical. He’s a salmon swimming upstream. He’s Sunday morning swooping in like a hero when you woke up thinking it was Monday.

So, hell yes.

I’m signing the paperwork.

I am given a document detailing my rights and the company’s sexual harassment policy. Unlike the employee handbook, I take my time to absorb and understand the words on the page. And once I do, my hand is moving, ink is coming out of the pen onto the dotted line and I’m consenting to a relationship of my own free will. Currently, I would probably sign a document agreeing to naked camping as long as I can be alone with Aiden sometime today. In the next fifteen minutes, preferably.

He strokes a big hand down my hair, picks up a pen and signs his own name, forgoing his right to make direct decisions about my employment going forward—a task which will be assigned to another manager—and he does it without taking his eyes off me once. Eyes that hold sensual promises and a guarantee that he’ll deliver.

Be alone with him in the next fifteen minutes?

Make that five.

With the formalities out of the way, he stands in front of me, so tall I have to tilt my head back, and he presses a kiss to the center of my forehead, exhaling deeply. Then he takes my hand and guides me out of HR toward the elevator bank. There are two other offices located just off this hallway and every single employee has stopped to watch us walk past, hand in hand. The heroic paragon of ethics and his ex-convict girlfriend.

What the hell am I doing?

I seriously don’t know, but I’m doing it. I’m allowing myself to grow from the lesson I’ve just learned. I’m not turning away from it. There are amazing people, like Aiden and Jordyn, who have spent time with me and made a positive judgment. One they didn’t even question when push came to shove—and I want to believe them. Badly. I want to believe that I’m the kind of person worth standing up for. I’m still the girl who let down her parents. I’m still the girl who can’t seem to withstand peer pressure from her childhood friend. But maybe it’s all right to test drive some trust in myself. My character. To see what I’m capable of. Just a little.

As I step into the elevator next to Aiden, our hands joined tightly, it’s impossible to ignore that he is not doing anything in half measures. There’s no pretending here. His all-or-nothing personality is another huge reason I hesitated to dive into a relationship.

I am…not all here yet.

Part of me is still mentally locked up. I woke up from a coma after four years to find that the world took giant leaps forward without me. When I walked out of Bedford Hills, my online courses, my second-hand car and my future were all gone, along with my makeup bag, clothes, phone and social acquaintances. All a thing of the past. Being here in New York, decorating windows for Vivant, still seems like an elaborate dream. I’m not used to it. Yet here I am, taking another wild leap into the unknown. And what it really all comes down to is…