I nodded slowly with a tight grin. Rose gave me a quick evil glare in return. When Rory glanced at her phone, head down, I stuck my tongue out at Rose. She had to bite her lips together to keep from laughing.
“Well, if Fisher’s home, I’m going to run these crossword puzzles over to him before I crash for the night. He asked for more. Isn’t that crazy?” I closed my book and stood.
“That is crazy. But I love that you have someone working on your puzzles.” Rory smiled.
“I do.” I smiled back, ignoring distrusting Rose. “See ya after a bit.”
Since it was getting late, I drove to Fisher’s house instead of walking there. I may have also added a little makeup in the car and a dab of perfume to make up for the rest of my casual attire, jeans and a hoodie. I wouldn’t have gotten away with anything dressier, not with Rose silently rooting for Team Angie.
“It’s late. I assumed you weren’t coming,” Fisher said when he opened the front door. I stole a silent moment to take him in—always sexy in jeans and a tee. That messy, dark blond hair. The beard I trimmed for him.
“Rose told me you were having dinner with my mom, so I waited until she got home. If it’s too late, I’ll just give you these…” I handed him the pile of puzzles “…and head home.”
“Too late for what? My roommate moved out. I’m officially free.”
I frowned, following him into the house. “I heard Angie’s staying with a friend while you date her. Big Friday night plans?”
He gestured to the sofa, and I sat in the middle while he took a seat in his recliner. “I don’t know. What should we do? Dinner and movie? Just dinner? Do I bring her back here? Or is that too weird since I asked her to move out?”
“You don’t remember the woman you’re engaged to. I think worrying about weird at this point is an afterthought. Do whatever feels right.”
Fisher ran his hands through his hair. “Ugh … I don’t know what feels right because I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about her.”
“It’s not about what you’re supposed to feel about her. Ask yourself how you honestly do feel about her. Let that be your starting point. I think you’ve already done that to some degree. I’m sure it wasn’t your family’s idea for her to move out and the two of you date. That was you. Go with that voice.”
“It’s hard to go with that voice because I do have this other voice in my head, the one that tries to put myself in her shoes. I’m sure I would be really messed-up if I loved someone and they didn’t remember me. I don’t think I could just walk away without a fight.”
Pulling my feet up and crisscrossing them, I formulated my response. He had no idea I was trying to see if I fit into his equation. “I couldn’t …” I smiled softly. “I couldn’t walk away without a fight.”
“You’re so young.” His lips turned into a pleasant smile. “How old are you?”
I chuckled. “What you mean is, how young am I? I’ll be twenty-four soon.”
“So you’re twenty-three.”
My eyes rolled upward. “Yes. I’m twenty-three.”
“And have you ever been in love?”
Oh, Fisher …
My mind immediately jumped back five years to the day on the playground.
“I’m trying so hard…” I whispered, my voice shaky in my chest and wobbly as the words fell from my lips “…trying so hard not to fall in love with you.”
A few breaths later, he whispered back, “I know.”
“Yes.”
“Tell me about him. What happened?”
I laughed and cleared my throat, cleared the pain from the memories. My memories. Fisher didn’t have memories of us. “Bad timing. I was young. And I was trying to figure out some things in my life. He had things in his life figured out quite well. So …” I pulled in a shaky breath and shrugged. “It was just … bad timing.”
“Did he love you back?” Fisher wasn’t the same man. The old Fisher wouldn’t have asked me those questions.
“I think so.” I couldn’t look at him, so I fiddled with the hem to my shirt and kept my gaze on my lap.
“Do you know where he is now? Have you thought about finding him?”
More pain escaped my chest, disguised as laughter while I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Yes, I’ve thought about finding him.”
“And?”
My head inched side to side as I continued to pinch the bridge of my nose. “And I’m not sure he’s ready to be found by me.”
“Why would you say that?”
My gaze lifted slowly to his. “Because he’s found someone else.” My lips fell into a frown as I lifted one shoulder like it was no big deal.
“Married?”
I shook my head. “No.”