Akara racks his brain, confused and concerned. “From literally the first time we’ve met, you’ve been making jokes about drowning and jumping off cliffs and crap, so what’s going on?”
“Gotta cope somehow with the big brother who got himself killed in a quarry,” I say light-heartedly, but the weight of my statement sinks heavily on me and Akara.
Realization rocks him. “It’s about Skylar?”
“Yeah. Isn’t it always?” I hear my bitterness, but I force myself not to shut down. I’m done burying Skylar. Talking about him, even in frustration or anger, has helped me understand these emotions and the casket of pain. It’s been heavy, carrying that around.
Opening it hurts more, in a different way. But I’m starting to not mind the pain.
“I just remembered something I’d forgotten for a long time…I guess something I tried to forget.” The memory still ices over my blood. How do I say this? I pop the lid to…Stromboli, and I nearly smile. God, I love Akara. Two beats later, I finally tell him, “I’m not sure it was an accident.”
“Skylar’s death?”
I nod tensely.
“You think someone killed him?”
“No. I’ve always been afraid he did it…” A rock enters my throat. My vision clouds with emotion. Eyes burning, I lower my gaze. “He did it himself.” I’ve never said that out loud. Never voiced my fear or gave power to the thought.
But here I am.
Eighteen years later.
“Wasn’t it ruled as an accident?” Akara asks softly.
“Everyone thinks he couldn’t see the water level in the dark and didn’t know it was that shallow.”
“But you don’t think that?”
I have no words.
Akara rests a comforting hand on my strained shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. Maybe you’re just looking back in hindsight after protecting Xander and going through his…” He trails off, seeing me shake my head.
“I always thought protecting someone like Xander was my second-shot at doing for him what my family couldn’t do for Sky. What I couldn’t do for my brother.”
Akara frowns. “So you’ve always thought Skylar killed himself that night?”
I want to tell him yeah. I want to tell him why. But my throat is swollen. Choked, I just nod once.
“It’s not your fault, you know? Whatever happened to Skylar—you were twelve, Banks. You were a kid.”
“I know that,” I say tightly and quietly. “But God, was I an idiot.”
“You’re not,” Akara snaps.
Even though he has half the story, I listen to his words and let them wash over me. Gratitude in my eyes, I nod to him.
Akara keeps a strong arm across my shoulders. Even it if means reaching up some to reach my height. At the sound of splashing, our heads turn. Attention veering on the mermaid.
Sulli pulls herself out of the water. Not even a glimpse our way, she returns to the block. Her dedication is impressive. And terrifying as hell.
“Should we call it?” I ask Akara.
Concern pulls at his brows. He holds his breath as she jumps back into the pool. “Shit,” he curses.
I lightly tap his shoulder.
He barely flinches. Just checks his watch. “She has to stop on her own time.”
“She’s a cute prune,” I say into a bite of cheese and pepperoni. “But I don’t like seeing her pushing herself like this.”
“You’ll get used to it,” Akara breathes.
“I don’t want to.” Another thought knocks into me. Nearly blows me back. “What if she loses?”
“What?” Akara frowns.
“What if she loses, Akara?” I ask again. “Like no gold.”
He goes stone-cold.
“It’d be bad?” I ask, my gut sinking. The Stromboli not sitting right. She just skipped out on her sister’s sweet sixteen. She’s missed birthdays. She’s missed family charity events. She’s missed everything since she started training. I need this to be worth it for her sake.
Akara runs a hand through his black hair, pulling at the strands a little. “Yeah, it’d be bad. Really fracking bad.” We exchange a graver look.
I’m praying that’s not gonna be her reality.
GBANewYork.com – July 26th
Akara Kitsuwon & Banks Moretti React to the 400m IM Upset, Sullivan Meadows Taking Silver
Standing poolside, bodyguards to Sullivan Meadows show clear concern and devastation as Meadows places second in the 400m IM and fails at defending her gold. A now infamous photo has circulated tabloid and sports covers since the crushing upset last night. In the picture, Akara Kitsuwon is crouching with steepled fingers to his agonized face, and Banks Moretti remains standing in an utter state of shock—one hand on his head and another hand on Kitsuwon’s shoulder.
More videos are trending of their instant reaction to the loss, as Moretti and Kitsuwon are not just bodyguards but boyfriends to Sullivan Meadows. The confirmation of their polyamorous relationship back in late January has been a hot button topic all year long. Tomorrow night, Meadows will return to the water to defend yet another gold. This time, in the 200m freestyle event against teammate and rival Frankie Hansen.