“We’re on it. They’ve been at work since Friday, I’m thinking they’ll have a report to us today with something, but after that, it’s out of my hands. I mean it, Van, unless we’re following legal channels I can’t be involved.”
“Good. I feel the need to kick someone’s ass.”
“We’ll see. I’d advise caution. You could get yourself in deeper, depending on what they find out.”
We wrap up the call, and I get through security carrying George in her carry on. I get to the gate just in time to board. I got an earlier flight, and I’m going to surprise Issi. She’s working from home today, and there’s something I need to do. I have zero doubts, and I don’t see why we are waiting for the stars to align.
We are going to align them. We’re smart, we can figure this out. Our work has been our life, but even I can see in Issi’s eyes, she’s changing like me and I don’t want to waste any more time.
She’s the one.
And when you find the one, you know.
My heart knows, and my cock knows, that’s for damn sure.
I settle into my first-class seat and look down at George’s head poking out of the carry on at my feet.
The flight attendant comes by, looking down and I wait for him to give me shit about keeping George completely inside her bag, according to the regulations.
Instead, he smiles and leans on the seat. “What can I get you to drink? Both of you.”
“I’ll take a Jack and Coke, and a bottle of water.”
He leans down. “There’s no one in this seat.” He points to the empty window seat next to me, “You can put her up here if you want. Just keep the bag mostly zipped.”
“Thanks.” I reach down and pull George’s carrier out and set it on the seat next to me. “Looks like it’s going to be our lucky day.” I reach over and scratch her between the ears, and she licks my fingers.
My heart is thumping around. I’m nervous. Something I’ve only been around Issi since as far back as I can remember. But, when I get there, I’m prepared. I’m ready for her to know just what this is, what this is going to be, and I just pray she’s on board with me.
Before we take off, I shoot Issi a quick text.
Me: Know I love you, baby. Know you are what I need. What I want. Don’t ever forget that.
The flight attendant comes by, nodding to my phone. “You’ll have to turn your phone off now, Sir. Or set it to airplane mode.”
I nod back and shut it down. It’s about to die anyway, but I’ll charge it when I get my rental car. In three hours I’ll be on the ground. In four, I’ll have Issi under me, asking her the question I never thought I’d ask anyone.
Eighteen
Issi
I STARE AT THE SILENT phone sitting on the table.
I’ve been watching it for nearly three hours.
After I received Van’s text, I messaged him back to call me, saying I had some work emergencies and he shouldn’t come tonight.
An hour later, I decided I had to call, but the phone went right to voice mail. He almost always answers, and if he doesn’t, he calls back within minutes.
I left another message for him to stay put, that I wouldn’t be available so to please call me as soon as possible.
I can’t get warm. I turned up the heat, but I’m shivering.
I’ve had a couple more calls with work, and one more with the CEO who gave me some more information on the situation with the merger and my association with Van. He’s given me twenty-four hours to let him know my decision, or he will make it for me.
The photo of him with that woman is seared into my mind. I do everything I can to stop thinking about it all. To pretend this was all just a mistake and I can go back to the Issi who’s never been connected to anyone before.
But I can’t. The pain is pervasive, and it reminds me at every microsecond I’m not the Issi I was. This Issi made a mistake and let herself get attached.
Fall in love.
Three fatal words.
I’ve never felt this sort of pain. It’s like my insides are turned out. Nothing feels real, and I can’t seem to connect to anything around me. I’m doubting everything that’s happened between Van and me. Why hasn’t he taken me to his house? Who was that woman, Gloria, who called him when we were in the restaurant, and he had to go outside to speak to her? Another mistress?
God, am I his mistress? Is that all I am to him?
I’m scared. There’s a physical pain in my chest, and if this is what heartbreak feels like, I know now why I worked so hard to avoid it my entire life.