Dr. Stud

I turn to the side so she can get the full glory of my belly on her screen.

“You know what, I am really starting to hate it when people ask me that. It makes me want to tell them that I’m not just to fuck with them.”

“Oh, don’t be such a crank!” she giggles. “When people don’t know what to say, they just say crazy things. What they mean is you look beautiful, Bunny! Positively radiant!”

“Radiant like a supernova, ready to blow, I figure,” I quip.

“Close enough! Is Sophia around? Does she want to say hi to Knox?”

“No,” I answer absentmindedly, peeking through a box of imported chocolates to try to find one I feel like eating. Strangely, none of them are appealing to me right now even though all I wanted was chocolate just yesterday. Figures.

Pretty soon, I’ll own my own body again, and may be able stop acting so damn weird.

I know, I know. I’m cranky.

“No?” Dahlia prods.

“Oh, sorry… I got distracted by chocolate. I meant that Sophia just went down for a nap. I’ll tell her that Knox said hi.”

“Yeah, let’s keep those two in touch. Wouldn’t it be cool if they got to be friends? Maybe even dating eventually or something like that? Falling in love? Getting married?”

Shaking my head, I force myself to eat a chocolate-covered raisin. It is disappointing.

“Let’s not marry them off just yet, okay? I bet Sophia is going to have a big problem trying to get approval for any suitors from her five dads, you know what I mean?”

“Jeez, yeah,” Dahlia exhales. “I can only imagine. I had enough trouble trying to get Daddy to sign on to me and August. And they were best friends forever!”

“So true. Hey, I need to get going. Today is Trey and Brock’s day, and I’m not sure how long Sophia will be napping. Plus, I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be feeling quite this frisky, you know? I gotta get it while I can.”

Dahlia wrinkles her nose. I have told her all about Trey and Brock, mostly because it scandalizes her so much. She couldn’t believe it at first. Actually, it turns out that she had no idea what I was walking into, and August hadn’t believed the rumors. He just assumed that I could take care of myself, and he was right. Little did he know he was sending me to my fairy tale ending.

But maybe he had some kind of intuition. Dahlia was always so judgmental about my love life, it actually feels pretty good to have something completely over-the-top to wave in her face. This is just how I was made. I am just a sexy, sexy bitch.

“To be honest, I can’t get enough of them,” I sigh, stroking my giant belly. “But since I have gotten so heavy, I think we’re gonna try doing it in the hot tub today. Not too hot, because of the baby, but it will be nice to be light on my feet again.”

Stroking my belly, I start to get turned on just thinking about it. If I touch myself just right, it sends shivers all over me, even across my giant boobs. I never knew how much fun really big breasts could be. But one time Sully started rubbing his dick in between them while I held them together until he came all over my chin. After that I suddenly understood why all those women wanted to get boob jobs. It’s like a secret sexual sign only people in the know understand.

“Yeah, I was pretty horny when I was pregnant too. I suppose that’ll show up any day now…” she muses, rolling her eyes dramatically.

“Any day now,” I repeat. “Dahlia, are you pregnant again?”

I see her hop up from her chair and take a step back, revealing her baby bump with a flourish.

“Totally pregnant!” she exclaims. “With twins this time!”

“Oh, wow! Congratulations! And tell August I said way to go!”

“I will! Try to get knocked up again as quickly as possible so we can be pregnant together!”

I laugh until my sides hurt, afraid to tell her that at the moment, I’m thinking about all the fun I’ll have when I’m not pregnant, more than anything else.

I hear the door open behind me and instantly get wet between my legs. Just knowing they’re here and what awaits me makes me crazy.

Leaning forward, I lower my voice to a whisper.

“Dahlia… my dates are here! I gotta go get laid!”

I see her embarrassed flinch just before I hit the button to disconnect the call. I know it’s sort of terrible of me to antagonize her like that, but I figure she has it coming. After all, she didn’t think I could do a regular nanny job, even without becoming a super concubine. If she had known the real details of the deal, she would have done everything in her power to stop it. Well, I really showed her.