Dirty Sweet Cowboy

“You are mine forever now, Parrish,” he whispers into my hair. “I will never lose you again .”

The last sense of anger melts away from me, and I begin to feel safe in his arms. He picks me up and carries me over to a pile of hay, then lays me down gently, before sitting down next to me. He brushes stray pieces of hay from my hair, and kisses away the sweat from my forehead .

“Do you believe me now, Parrish? Do you believe there is no other woman I want to be with in this world?” he whispers into my ear .

I feel a desperate cry settling in my chest. It’s a combination of pure love, and need, and fear. As I look into his eyes, I see my future, and for a moment, I can almost imagine letting go of the pain he caused me in the past. I can believe that he won’t hurt me again. I believe… that he loves me .

“Yes, yes Hawk. I believe you .”

As he holds me close against the chill in the air, I find comfort in the peace he is bringing me. If only for this moment, I find peace .

Hawk

I t’s been two weeks since the party, and Parrish and I still haven’t figured out how to tell my parents that we are, well, together. It’s pretty obvious to Anna and Carter, who have been teasing us relentlessly when we are out of ear shot of mom and dad. And I thought for a second the gig was up for sure when Simone’s article in Modern Architecture arrived. They’d devoted the cover story to the stable build, and then, when we opened up the story to read it, my name wasn’t mentioned anywhere. Not once. It was like I hadn’t even been here, despite the fact I designed the new stable. My dad read the story a dozen times, then looked at me like he was losing his mind .

“Hawk, I don’t understand. That reporter spent a galdurn month following you around like a puppy dog, and now… It’s like you didn’t even exist. What did you do to her ?”

Parrish shot me daggers, and I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe it was an oversight ?”

“An oversight? You designed the damn building, Hawk! I’m going to call this editor right now,” dad said as he stood up with a grumble. Then Parrish looked panicked, and I started stumbling over excuses, when Anna cleared her throat with a smile .

“Hey, Dad, I thought about inviting Sid over for dinner this weekend. What do you think ?”

At that moment, I could have thrown my arms around my sister and offered to give her all of the money in my bank account. The next hour was spent discussing whether or not Sid and Anna were serious, where their relationship was going, and why exactly he was coming over for dinner. It was just distracting enough for Parrish and I to escape unscathed .

But now, we are sitting at a family dinner, Mom and Dad are discussing plans for the holidays, when my dad looks at me with a raised eyebrow .

“Speaking of, son. Are you planning on just staying here until Christmas now? You don’t seem all that anxious to pack up and head back to California .”

I reach a hand down under the table and squeeze Parrish’s hand. My other hand is setting on the box in my jacket, the box that has been burning a hole in my pocket for a week. I look over at Anna, who rolls her eyes .

“Yes, Papa, I am pretty confident that Hawk isn’t going anywhere. Parrish, Hawk, would you like to tell them why? Or Carter and I can do it? Hell, Gracie probably could at this point. But for the love of all that is holy, will someone spill the beans and get it over with it ?”

Mom looks across the table at us, completely confused. “Hawk? What is your sister talking about ?”

Parrish and I both laugh nervously, before she clears her throat. “Sam. Candy. Hawk and I have something we need to tell you. Something kind of important .”

I squeeze her hand again. “Actually, Parrish. Do you mind if I take over ?”

She shakes her head, and shrugs, but looks a little more stressed than she did a second ago. I stand up from the table and set my napkin down, trying to put the fact that everyone is staring at me out of my head .

“Mama, D

ad, this may seem crazy to you. And it seems crazy to me, honestly. But I am in love with Parrish. I am crazy, out-of-my-mind, head-over-heels in love with her. And I think she feels the same way about me .”

Every eye turns to Parrish, and we watch her cheeks turn red in real time. But she nods with a smile .

“Hawk, what in the damn hell are you talking about?” dad says, running his hands over his face. “Are you trying to tell us you’re in love with your brother’s wife ?”

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you, dad. I’ve been in love with her since we were kids. I never stopped loving her. And it may not make a lot of sense to you now, but I promise you. There is no one on this earth that can love her, and take care of her, and Gracie, as well as I can .”

I turn to Parrish, and with a smile, I get down on my knee. I hear Carter and Anna gasp in unison, and my father mutter, “what in the hell is happening in this house?” I reach in to my pocket and pull out the little velvet jewelry box, and flip it open, revealing a perfect, sparkling, pear-shaped diamond. Parrish covers her eyes, and shakes her head, so I reach up and pull her hands away .

“Honey, look at me. Please .”

She opens her eyes and there are tears in them .

“Parrish Elizabeth Monroe McCormick, you were loved and adored by one of the best men I’ve ever known in my entire life. I only hope to be half the man Matt was, half the husband, half the father he could have been. But I know, in my heart, that my love for you is bigger than any challenge we may face. Any obstacle ahead of us. So, I’m asking you now, in front of our family, in front of your perfect daughter, if you’ll do me the honor of allowing me to be your husband ?”