Dirty Sweet Cowboy

She takes a step toward me, her arms floating up from her sides as though lifted by an invisible wind .

“Excuse me? You have a what? How is that possible since you have not given out a single resume since we’ve been here, Ava ?”

I shrug, looking away. She’s about to figure it out, any second, but I don’t want her reading it all over my face. “Oh, you know, it’s really nothing. Just an internship .”

Bea walks in a small circle, looking around my room. She points suddenly at my luggage and the open drawer .

“Wait, so you’re really leaving?” she asks incredulously. “Like, you’re leaving early? You’re just done ?"”

I meet her eyes and see her face change immediately .

“Oh,” she sighs. “Ethan gave you a ‘job .’”

“Yeah, I’m supposed to pack up. We’re leaving .”

“Just like that ?”

She shrugs, then glances up at the ceiling, then glances in the mirror. She seems to weigh the situation in her mind and finally holds her hand out in front of her like she’s balancing knowledge in the pit of her palm .

“Well aren’t you just the luckiest job seeker in the whole world?” she sniffs. “Make sure you Instagram the whole thing, okay? Does he have a private jet or something ?”

“Oh, well, I don’t know about that …”

“I bet he totally has a private jet,” she says to herself, strolling over to the long line of brightly lit windows and dropping into the club chair, crossing her legs with a flourish .

“He probably has several jets. A guy with a yacht in the San Francisco Bay probably also has jets… cars… houses? Where is he taking you ?”

I creep back over to the dresser, feeling just about ready to pack again. Bea doesn’t seem alarmed by the situation at all. This is not what I was expecting .

“Yeah, it doesn’t matter,” she muses. “I mean, if he takes you to Houston or Philadelphia or Miami or even LA, what’s the difference ?”

Yeah, what’s the difference? I ask myself. I’ve already sort of signed on, pretty much convinced myself that the summer fling is the best possible thing for me, even without the ruse of a supposed job offer. Does it matter what city I end up in? It doesn’t really matter what my internship is or isn’t. I’m just going with the flow. Just being breezy, carefree Ava .

“You know, I can see this. I actually like this side of you,” Bea says as though she’s reading my mind. “Usually you’re so …”

I pick up the stack of panties, letting it hover over the luggage before dropping them in .

“I’m usually so… what ?”

“You know,” she shrugs. “Uptight .”

“Hey!” I protest. “I’m not uptight. That is not nice to say at all. I’m just the right amount of… tight .”

“A twenty-two-year-old virgin is definitely uptight, Ava,” she informs me wryly. She might have a point, but it is still not a nice thing to say. “You know, if you let your guard down a little, you might enjoy it. And like you said before, Ethan is the perfect man to practice with. Free and easy. No strings .”

I open up another drawer, removing a small stack of T-shirts and some fluttery, wraparound skirts .

“Well it’s an internship,” I mumble, hearing how thin and unbelievable that sounds .

“Ha!” she barks. “Sure it is, Ava. Or it’s just a convenient excuse to get your freak on .”

“No strings, right,” I say again, hearing the words out loud. It’s good. It feels solid .

I hear her sigh as she leans back in the chair, gazing out the window thoughtfully. “Just promise me you’ll have fun,” she smiles. “Whatever comes at you… just go for it. This is like a fairytale, you know? Like an absolute fairytale. Don’t miss any of it .”

All my clothes are in the suitcase now and I turn to her. She seems completely at ease, totally encouraging and as supportive as always .

“Do you really mean that? Just go for it ?”