Dirty Sweet Cowboy

“Are you serious? Are you even kidding me right now ?”

I hold my fingers up, Boy Scout style .

“I am one hundred percent serious, Ava. This is your house .”

“I don’t know what to say,” she chokes. “Wait a second… this is your project? The one you talked about when we were at the restaurant ?”

I just smi

le, nodding. Definitely a project. Over the last few months, it’s organized my thoughts. It’s given me a reason to keep going. More than anything, it showed me that the only thing that I really want to be thinking about is Ava and the babies .

“I can live here ?”

“You can live here. The kids can live here. You could even… live here with me .”

Her brow furrows .

“Live here with you?” she repeats .

I step toward her, taking her hands in mine. I’m grateful to feel that she doesn’t pull away .

“It’s totally up to you,” I promise. “But if you wanted… you could live here with me and the babies and we can all be here together because I love you .”

She just stares at me. I have to tell her again .

“I love you, Ava. I don’t want to spend a day without you. I want us to be here together, if you want that. Only if you want that. Even if you don’t want that, I’ll still keep loving you. I can’t help it .”

She takes a deep breath, and I hear the shudder in her chest. Her hands tremble in mine .

“I have… it’s a party. It’s for me. I have to go back to the party,” she says, her voice weak .

“Of course you do,” I shrug. I should probably be disappointed, but I can’t be. Now she knows. I had to tell her. It felt amazing. I’ve done everything I can do .

The rest of the afternoon, everything is perfect. The food is great, Bert utters at least six actual words, and he must have said something to Evelyn because she even gives me a small wave and a smile at one point .

By the time the sun goes down, people begin leaving, bundling up in heavy coats to go back out into the San Francisco cold. I thank Aden and the Harrisons, dropping paper cups into a trash bag as I walk around, imagining what it is going to be like when Ava and the children are living here. Assuming that’s what she wants to happen .

“Really was a wonderful party,” she says to me from across the room. I turn around and smile .

“I’m glad you enjoyed it. I really think everybody had a good time .”

I pick up trash for a while, finally setting the bag down in the hallway by the kitchen. Perry will be by in the morning anyway. It’s not that I have to do this, it’s just that I like taking care of it .

“So… did you decide about your present ?”

She rolls her eyes. Her hands float out from her body as she turns in a slow circle in the dining room .

“My present? That’s kind of an understatement, isn’t it?” she says, a charming laugh peppering her voice. “This is a house, Ethan. This a frickin’ house . ”

“So you’ll take it then ?”

She pauses for a moment, knuckling her chin thoughtfully. Her blue eyes sparkle in the light from the chandelier .

“Well… it depends .”

“Anything. Just tell me what you need, Ava .”

“You should stay. Here. With us .”