The smile he gave me was bright and big, once again as if he couldn’t believe I was
sitting right here before him. And my heart lurched in my chest. When he sat next to me, the bed dipping from his substantial height and weight, I slid closer to him. I placed my palms flat on the bed to stop myself from sliding even more, but the truth was I wouldn’t mind being plastered right up against his side.
“Lass, ye need tae eat. Ye’ll make yerself sick.” I could hear the worry in his voice, and I felt bad that I’d caused it.
“I tried. But my mind is on other things, and stress is kind of an appetite suppressant.”
He didn’t say anything else, didn’t push me, berate me, try to parent me on what was best for me. He didn’t do anything but sit there and give me the silent support I felt surround me.
“Cian,” I said softly and lifted my head to look at him fully. “What’s going to happen next?” I licked my lips and started rubbing my hands up and down my sweats. “Because I’m pretty damn scared.”
My body tightened in pleasure when I felt his arm wrap around my shoulders as he tucked me in closer. Our thighs touched, my body pressed right up against him. I rested my head on his chest, staring straight ahead, taking in his scent, letting his warmth move through me.
“Ye donna have tae be scared,” he said in that rough timbre that set me on fire. “I’m no’ going tae let anything harm ye. I’m no’ going tae let anyone take ye away from me.” I felt the way his fingers tightened against my arm, as if he wanted to reassure himself that I was right here with him.
I couldn’t answer, so I just moved my arm behind him and wrapped it around his waist. I felt his body tense as I held him like he held me, but there was nothing sexual about this act. It was two people comforting each other in the face of the unknown. Or more so Cian comforting me, because I felt this supernatural man didn’t let anything threaten him.
After long moments I finally asked, “What did Odhran say that made you look the way you did, as if you’d seen a ghost?”
He didn’t speak for a long second, and I wondered if he’d answer me. It wasn't my business, but given the situation, I felt like whatever Odhran had said was tightly connected to all the things going on. Finally he gave my arm a gentle squeeze and then pulled away, shifting on the bed so his body was now facing me and he could look into my face.
“Odhran is as old as I am… and once had a mate. He claimed she was his war prize, but she was kidnapped before he could mark her as his.” My eyes widened slightly at the fact that he used past tense. He ran a hand over the back of his head and exhaled. “He changed after that, became more aggressive, withdrawn if it didn’t have to do with battle. And he’s been searching for decades to find her.”
I didn’t say anything, didn’t ask him questions, even though they were at the tip of my tongue. I waited for him to sift through his memories and thoughts to tell me when he was ready.
“That human man we were fighting at the motel parking lot, before he died… he told Odhran they had his mate and he’d never find her. He confirmed that tae be the truth when he said her name.”
The air left me violently at that revelation.
“Of course at the time, we didn’t kno’ who had taken his mate, but now it’s verra clear it was the Assembly.” His jaw clenched tightly. “I can only imagine the horror and pain Odhran has been living with this whole time. And the only reason he hasn’t succumbed to fading away is the hope she’s still out there.”
I felt my eyes prickle with the threat of tears, and I swallowed, my throat tight as emotion tried to clog it. I had to assume his mate was a supernatural creature, that or at this point, decades later, she’d be elderly if she were human. But I didn’t ask any of these things. It was clear that it was hard for Cian to even mention all of this, and it wasn’t even about his mate. I couldn’t imagine what Odhran was feeling.
I felt the tears slide down my cheeks. Cian snapped his head in my direction instantly, and the way his face softened as he took in the sadness clearly written on my face, how he lifted his hand and smoothed the droplets of tears away with his thumb, had me crying harder.