The Alpha (The Lycans 4)

22

Evelyn

I woke with a start, my heart pounding as I shifted on the couch, the book I’d been reading slipping from my lap and hitting the floor with a thump.

For a moment panic set in because I wasn't oriented enough to know where I was, but as consciousness seeped into me, I remembered everything in a horrifying rush of awareness. I felt the heavy absence of Cian, and it was strange to sense this gaping distance for someone so shortly after they’d come into my life.

I sat up and grabbed the book, one of the few “props” that had been in the house. The story itself had been boring enough to put me to sleep, or maybe I was just so mentally exhausted that my body took over for me and shut things down.

I wished I was back in that subconscious state where I wasn’t worrying about what was going on and if Cian was okay. I wished I could go back days before, when we’d been in that motel room, and although I was afraid of the future, we didn’t have all this other shit in the way.

“Ye dozed off for only ten minutes.”

I looked over at Odhran, who stood in the entryway of the living room, his shoulder leaning against the wall. His big arms were crossed over his broad chest. We didn’t speak, but I could see the exhaustion still written heavily over his face. Although we were strangers, I felt like we were kind of one and the same in the kindred spirit department. It was as if my loneliness recognized his.

“I…” I wasn’t sure what to say, didn’t want to make the situation weird or awkward. But ever since I’d sat across from him at the dining room table and told him I was sorry, I’d felt him retreat even more into himself, become colder, more detached and apathetic. I could see intelligence in his eyes and knew he was planning something. I know he’s planning on getting his mate back, and he won’t stop until he succeeds.

He gave me a small smile, even though I hadn’t been able to finish my sentence. The situation was hard all around, and neither one of us knew how to navigate it.

“I’m going tae clean up, but it shouldn’t take me more than five minutes. Ye’ll be okay?” He wasn’t asking me because he thought I was an invalid and didn’t trust my judgment or state of mind. I could tell by the tone of his voice and the softness of his expression. I knew he just wanted to make sure I wasn’t too spooked and would be fine by myself.

He was looking out for me because Cian wasn't here.

I was thankful for his concern and his company. But I wanted Cian here so much more that it felt like I had this wound in the center of my body that I knew would never heal. “I’ll be fine, but thank you. Take your time.” I knew nothing about magical houses or enchanted witchcraft that protected things, but I did feel safe with Odhran.

He gave a curt nod, and once I was alone, I got up and walked over to the bookcase, one that had some faux plants on the shelves, a couple of vases, and a picture frame that still had the insert of the fake family in it. I set the book where I’d found it and turned to the window, the curtains closed, yet I still felt fully exposed.

I wrapped my arms around my middle. Although I knew Cian wasn’t that far away—a ten-minute driving distance, he’d told me—I couldn’t help but feel like there was an ocean between us. It was a strange feeling to be so connected to somebody after just meeting them, to feel like your lives were already intertwined and you didn’t even know how it happened.

It didn’t make any logical sense. But at the same time it made all the sense in the world. It was a fantastical situation. But I trusted it. I believed in myself and what I felt, trusted my gut to lead me in the right direction. It had always held strong and true my entire life, and I knew now wouldn’t be any different.

I was vaguely aware of the sound of pipes creaking as Odhran started the shower, and made my way into the kitchen. I stared at the cupboards, the fridge, my hunger hanging out in the background. Then again, when you were in an impossible situation, the last thing your body needed was sustenance, not when it was trying to survive in other ways.

I was about to go rummage for something to eat and force myself to consume something so my belly wouldn’t be empty, when the sound of somebody at the front door had me freezing. The three knocks that sounded seemed like gunshots through the house.