The knock came again, louder and more insistent this time.
“Vicki? It’s me. How are you doing, honey?” Her eyes screwed shut at the sound of that deep, slow drawl. Right now, she wished he would just leave her alone.
“Go away, please,” she implored him.
She held her breath during the long silence that followed, hoping he would leave, wishing he would stay. Not sure which of the two she truly wanted.
God, she was a complete mess.
“I can’t. Not until I know you’re okay.”
She got up and trudged to the door, yanking it open to glare at him. He looked as bad as she felt. His hair was a mess, his jaw bristled with dark stubble, his shirttails were hanging out, and his pants were wrinkled. He looked like a delinquent schoolboy. It was not a look she had ever seen on clean-cut Tyler Chambers before. It gave him an air of naked vulnerability.
“I’m not okay,” she told him. His eyes raked over her body and face, honing in on her swollen eyes and red nose. “I’m hurt. And annoyed with myself. Because, it shouldn’t have come as such a shock to me to know that I’m not important enough to you to merit a heads up about the fact that you’re staying after I leave.”
“No, Vicki, that’s not it at all.” His voice was urgent, almost desperate. “I kept putting it off because I didn’t want to ruin our last few days together.”
“How long have you known?” she asked, and what looked very much like guilt shadowed his eyes.
“Brand mentioned it just after we arrived.”
“You’ve known for nearly three weeks?” She couldn’t disguise the resigned hurt in her voice. His jaw clamped while his eyes bored into hers intently.
“I’m sorry. We were so…we were…” He seemed to be hunting for the appropriate word, and the frustration on his face told her that he was at a complete loss.
“Happy,” she supplied, unable to keep the resentment out of her voice. “That’s what we were. We were having fun, enjoying each other’s company…and we were happy.”
He stared at her mutely, his lips thinned, his breathing fast and uneven.
“Vicki, you knew this would end.”
“I did.”
“Then why are you being so—” Her warning look halted whatever he had been about to say.
“I was hoping it would end on a good note.”
“It can end on a good note, Vicki. It doesn’t have to be like this.”
“No. I don’t think so. I don’t matter to you, not in any meaningful way. I never did.”
His eyes flashed with anger. “Come on, Vicki, that’s bullshit and you know it. Look, I get it, you’re pissed off, and you’re lashing out.”
“Ty I’m not pissed off. Okay, a small part of me is, but mostly at myself.” God, she was so exhausted. She rubbed her burning eyes and willed the ever-present tears away. “You warned me—over and over again—you gave me plenty of opportunities to back out. Yet, here I am, irrationally hurt because the man who told me that he doesn’t do love and didn’t want messy feelings involved in our little fuckfest, is proving as good as his word. The only one I can truly blame for the way I feel right now, is me. Because I knew exactly what I was getting myself into, and I still allowed myself to fall in love with you.”
Oh, man! Why had she said that? It had just slipped out. Now there it was, writhing painfully on the floor between them.
He froze, literally froze, and stared at her like a deer caught in the headlights. He looked terrified, as if he feared she would leap at him and infect him with her icky, gross love.
He took a wary, offensive step back and Vicki flinched. So unbearably hurt by that instinctive—and telling—reflex.
His reaction confirmed everything she had already known about this doomed relationship—for lack of a better word.
“You should leave,” she whispered, massaging her temples.
“Vicki.”
“Don’t worry, Ty. I don’t expect anything from you. I’ll be fine. I just need to not be around you right now.”
“I’m…”
“If the next word out of your mouth is going to be sorry, please just save it. I don’t need you to be sorry. All I need from you right now, is your absence.”
“I’ll uh…I’ll check on you later, okay?”
“No!” She couldn’t help it; she lost her temper.
Why the hell wouldn’t he leave? It was a simple request. Yet, here he still was.
Hovering.
Still wanting to be the protector she had never wanted or needed.
“I don’t want you to check on me. I don’t want you tiptoeing around me like I’m a bomb about to explode all over you. I can’t deal with that right now. In fact, you probably won’t be needed for the rest of my stay here. We have a packed schedule. I’ll be spending the remainder of my time here with my family. So please just leave me alone.”