“An eternity,” she whispered, a hint of awe in her voice, but also a note of regret. Glancing over her shoulder, she reminded him, “I told you humans can’t comprehend that extensive amount of time.”
“And you would carry your painful memories with you,” he warned her, in the interest of full disclosure.
Her lips twisted and her brow dipped. Then she shook her head and said, “Not exactly.”
This perplexed Davian. “What do you mean?”
Facing him, she said, “I inadvertently took Sheena to the spot where my parents were murdered by the shifters that had stalked them. Once there, I somehow felt compelled to tell her what happened and how ashamed I was I didn’t do anything to save them.”
“Jade,” he stared at her, aghast. “You were eleven years old. What could you have possibly done?”
“Led the wolves away so my parents could have escaped.”
“And they would have watched you be slaughtered.” He gripped her shoulders. “Your parents would not have escaped, Jade. Your father would have followed after the shifters. They would have killed him regardless.”
“That’s basically what Sheena said. And I know it’s true. But you can’t tell me that every time I ended up in battle with the fire wraith that you didn’t hate yourself for not doing something to keep me from getting hurt.”
His hands dropped. “You have a point.”
“Anyway,” she said. “I made myself really think about what Sheena said and…so much more. I realized I couldn’t continue to cling to those excruciating feelings. I’d let them become too big a part of me and, to be honest, I used them as a crutch. I used them to keep me secluded in my cottage and distant from people. And that was wrong. I’ve learned how wrong that was. So… I let them go.”
This time, his eyes searched hers. Davian had to admit, there was a vibrant clarity to her sapphire irises he’d never seen before. Despite a few spilt tears moments before, torment no longer filled her eyes.
“How…?” He was at a loss for the correct words.
She shrugged. “I don’t know exactly, except to say that I reached a point where I could continue to allow the pain to taunt me or
I could push it away from me. Expel it. I was ready, I guess. I knew it was time.”
The backs of his fingers brushed her cheek. “And you’re all right?”
“Yes. I feel about fifty pounds lighter, actually.”
He chuckled. “You would joke.”
“Why not?” she asked. “I can’t live the rest of my life under a dark cloud. It suited me initially, sure. But no longer. I can envision so much more for myself now. Because of you. As well as Sheena and Morgan. Toran and my human friends.”
His fingers skimmed her jaw and down her throat. He touched the Star of Nathea and said, “You could have an eternity to explore everything you were meant to be, Jade. Everything you were meant to do.” He gave her an earnest and beseeching look as he all but begged, “Spend it with me.”
She pulled in a ragged breath. Conflicting emotions flashed in her eyes as she said, “But I irritate you on a regular basis.”
He laughed a bit heartier this time. “Yes, but I still love you. I always will, I told you that. I haven’t done a good job of showing it this past month and I promise to rectify that. Make up for it. But, Jade, if you were immortal… Your tenacity wouldn’t disconcert me so much. I’d still insist you be careful, yet you’d be much more resilient.”
“Are you saying you still want to marry me?”
“I never stopped wanting to marry you.”
“But—”
“Yes, I know.” He sighed, guilt festering in his core. “I’ve been intolerant, obstinate and I’ve avoided you. I’m not proud of any of this. Clearly, I have anger management issues to work through.”
Jade bit her lower lip, likely to keep from declaring he’d just made a monumental understatement.
“Look at the couth and diplomacy you’re demonstrating?” he offered. “You really have learned a lot. Although you could be more discreet with your sarcastic expressions.”
She smiled. “I’ll work on that.”
Gazing into her eyes, he said, “I can only ask you this once in order for it to take effect. Will you stay with me, Jade…forever?”