But she had allowed herself to fall for Vin. So maybe, deep in her heart, she’d held out some hope that they were doing more than just going off to college together.
She’d told Rogen at her house that she wasn’t certain a future with Vin would have panned out, because he might have decided halfway through school that he really wanted to be at Yale. And she’d believed what she’d said at the time—she’d never hung huge hopes on what five or ten years down the road would look like with Vin. Primarily because she was accustomed to having the rug ripped from underneath her.
But … wow. Vin had bought a ring.
She fought to compose herself. Splashed water on her face. Patted her skin dry. Wondered if that little tidbit was what had set Rogen off and made him punch Vin. Probably.
So maybe this threesome was a bit more volatile than she’d ever imagined.
Then again, it was imperative to finally lay the remaining pieces of the past on the table, so that they could perhaps get over it all. Move on. Cut the cord on that one week a decade ago.
Well, and the years leading up to it.
Jewel pulled in steadying breaths. Felt a bit more collected.
She realized her heart didn’t just hurt for her sake. For all that hadn’t come to fruition in her life. She hurt for Vin, for how he’d been blindsided, betrayed. She hurt for Rogen, for all the choices he’d never been able to make for himself as a teenager under parental control.
She hoped getting it all out in the open was the cleanse
the three of them needed.
Jewel left the bathroom and returned to her seat. Crossed her legs. Rested her hands in her lap.
Both Rogen and Vin eyed her curiously.
A few tense minutes passed. Then Rogen raked a hand through his hair and said, “This has become an all-or-nothing situation amongst us. What you said last night—that you’re committed to us both … The thing is”—he shot Vin a look—“we’re both committed to you, too. The fact is, we’re all right for one another. Vin and I enjoy threesomes. You’re well aware of that now. But we’ve never met a woman we wanted an actual relationship with, even if being partners in pleasuring her is ideal and desirable for us both.”
“The question is,” Vin interjected, “do you fully understand what you were saying last night, Jewel? What it would really mean to be in a permanent relationship with us … both of us. No choosing.”
“No more secrets, either,” Rogen added.
Jewel forced herself not to bite her bottom lip. She’d meant what she’d said to them the previous evening. But they both had a point.
A permanent ménage.
That was something that would go public.
Something she’d have to share with her family and friends. And, yes, even her coworkers. Because the relationship would never be strictly confidential.
Yet there was a bit more than that at stake. Rogen and Vin each held a claim on her. They were just territorial enough to make this risky business. They’d never fought over a woman, because they’d never both cared so deeply for the same woman—except her. She knew that.
She also knew that the last thing she ever wanted to do was hurt either one of them again. Or come between them.
Rogen was suggesting she become a part of their sexual lifestyle; Jewel heard his convictions. The men wanted this to continue beyond the whirlwind trip they were currently on.
Question was, had this evolved into a case of be careful what you wish for—for all parties involved?
Jewel mulled this over. She couldn’t give either of them up, and they weren’t asking her to. But in the grand scheme of things, in the light of day, in the harsh truth of reality beyond Cabo and Vegas and Paris … Was it honestly a possibility?
More than that … was it a sensible possibility?
She still didn’t have an answer, so she said, “We have a lot to sort out when we get back to California.”
Rogen sat back in his seat.
Vin reached for his magazine.
Jewel closed her eyes. And worked really, really hard to clear her mind. At least for a little while.