"What's the reason I think?" Paulie asked quietly, compassion filling his rough voice.
"Second thoughts about Avery," Kane replied instantly.
"No, Son, I never thought that," Paulie said, shaking his head. "Not once. You two are like peas and carrots, you just fit."
Kane bit his lip. It was a question he'd been thinking about for some time. Finally, he just blurted the words out, "Does this marriage mock God?" His eyes were trained on Paulie, watching every single move he made. Uncertain and scared, Kane had no doubt desperation was written all over his face, but Paulie had never steered him wrong in the past, and he knew if anyone would be honest with him, that person would be Paulie. He chastised himself for not finding the balls to talk to Paulie about this months ago.
Behind everyone's back, Kane had spent months secretly pouring through the New Testament. He was a Christian and believed wholeheartedly in the New Testament, but no matter how much he researched, he found no clear answers supporting the beliefs he had been raised on regarding homosexuality. Finally, he had decided to let that be enough, but now, as their marriage loomed over him, he had to know for sure.
"Why would you think such a thing?" Paulie asked. "It's never wrong to marry for the right reasons, Kane. Committing yourself to Avery in the name of the Lord is serious business, I give you that, but I can't see how God would be upset by this at all, for any reason. You deserve a happy life, Son. Sometimes I still don't think you understand that, but it doesn't change the facts. You deserve to be happy. God wants you happy. And Avery makes you happy, doesn't he?"
Kane was silent for several long moments, staring at Paulie, thinking over what he'd said. Paulie had used those same words countless times on him throughout the years, sometimes they eased him, sometimes they didn't. Paulie squeezed his shoulder, seeming to know, and patted him before stepping back.
"We've got pictures to take. That cameraman doesn't like to wait. He thinks highly of himself always talking about all his National Geographic prints like that's supposed to impress me. I was in the trenches of World War II. I saw enough national geographies to…" Paulie was on roll.
Kane checked himself one last time in the mirror and jumped in as Paulie stopped to take a breath. "Did anyone in my family come?" Kane asked, effectively stopping Paulie's rant, but he did look up at Kane, staring him directly in the eyes. After all this time, Paulie had grown to dislike his family with a vengeance, but today he didn't let that show.
"No, Son, they didn't come. At least I haven't seen them yet," Paulie said. Kane never really expected them to actually show when he sent the invitations. It just felt wrong for him not to invite them.
"I knew they wouldn't," Kane said and lowered his eyes, looking down at the floor. He just couldn't bring himself to meet Paulie's gaze for fear he would find pity. He was so freaking emotional today. He hadn't seen his family in fifteen years, why did he feel like crying today because they weren't here?
"You aren't in the wrong, Kane," Paulie said, brushing his hand across his signature buzz cut as if for some reason the short, almost nonexistent hair could ever mess up. And honestly, it wasn't so much a buzz cut as just plain bald, but Paulie acted like there was still hair left on his head.
"I don't know, maybe I am. I just haven't been able to figure out how to change the way I am or the way I feel." Kane glanced at his watch. "Are you ready?" he asked, motioning for Paulie to open the door. Avery had every minute of this day planned to precision. It wouldn't do for Kane to throw them off by being his normal analytical and apparently newfound negative self.
"Because it's not changeable, Kane Dalton! We've been over this." Paulie frowned again, pulling open the door with a huff. "You are so damned hardheaded, and you don't listen. I've been saying this since I met you. It's like changing a pumpkin into a carriage, you just can't do it."
"Thank you for standing by me today," Kane said, looking down at Paulie. He always had a way of making him feel better about things, and changing the direction of his wayward thoughts. Like he'd done so many times before, he gave a silent prayer of thanks for having Paulie come into his life. He kept step with Paulie as they headed toward the chapel.
"I wouldn't be anywhere else. You're family to me, Son. You gave me back a life, and anyway, don't I look good all gussied up in these fancy duds?" Paulie laughed, straightening to his full height. Kane could only smile as Paulie attempted to pull him out of his funk.
"You look great. I knew you would." Kane beamed, and Paulie grinned back, giving him a nod. Lord, it felt good to smile. He'd taken himself way too serious lately. "Avery's already here at the church? I've been weird lately. I'm surprise he showed."
"Yep, he's here. Even after all his rules that everyone needs to make sure you two stay apart, they're having a hard time keeping him from coming to see if you're really here. He's worried you're gonna bolt," Paulie said.
Kane laughed at the absurdity of that thought as he opened the big ornately carved chapel doors and let Paulie step inside before him. They both came to an abrupt halt. Kane had been involved in the wedding plans. He went to every meeting Avery asked him to attend, had a say in every part of the design, but nothing prepared him for this moment, for the sheer beauty Avery had created.
There were thousands of flowers, all in white. Hydrangeas, roses, peonies, and calla lilies were draped across every pew, altar, pillar, archway, and candelabra in the entire church. Dozens and dozens of large urn planters were filled to overflowing with bouquets of white calla lilies. The high windowsills had cascading blooms dripping off their edges. Thousands and thousands of white rose petals outlined the walkway they were to take to the altar. The chapel was breathtakingly beautiful and fragrant, and Avery had done this for just him. He loved flowers, they calmed his soul and settled him. Beautiful blooms were a staple of their home and this seemed very much a gift from Avery just to him.