Painted On My Heart

Kellus nodded, appreciating those words. “John’s mad at me. He’s lashing out. I’ve called the police. I’ve reported him now a couple of times. I’m not replacing anything because he keeps stealing it, and now he’s started to realize that I’m moving on with my life. He’s not happy about that.”

Both Arik’s palms came to his face, cradling his head gently. “He’s left you no choice.”

“I know that. You know that. He sees a choice. His side of this coin is that he wants me to lead that party life with him. I understand now that he doesn’t believe in monogamy,” he explained. Bewilderment crossed Arik’s face.

“Doesn’t he know anything about you? You’d never do any of that,” Arik said incredulously, dropping his hands.

Kellus eyed something under the sofa, making him step away. He pushed the couch back and found a torn open condom pack. Well, at least someone had enough sense to protect themselves. He picked it up and stuffed it in the trash before heading toward the kitchen.

“Everything’s always been about him, so no, he doesn’t know me. It’s taken me a long time to figure that out. I’ve known him for twenty years. He was the most important person in my life for the majority of that time.”

“I don’t want to be offensive. I swear to God I don’t, but I don’t get that at all,” Arik said, following behind him.

“You didn’t know him in the good times. He was larger than life. He had potential. Out of the both of us, he was supposed to be the successful one. He wanted to model and planned to take care of us. He even signed a modeling contract. I just felt lucky to be in his life.”

Arik stared at him, seeming truly surprised as Kellus placed the one full bag down to lift another out of the bin.

“Don’t worry, no one gets it. I’ve been told I’m wrong to think like I do. I just thought we had everything back then. We were best friends—before anything else. We were together just about every single day since fifth grade.”

“What I see is that you emotionally carried him. Then you financially supported him,” Arik responded.

“Not always.” Kellus shook his head. Arik had only seen the out-of-control, thieving addict. He didn’t know. He couldn’t understand.

“I doubt that. I’m sorry, but I do. I’ve watched you regularly undervalue yourself. I bet you always have,” Arik said and looked down at his clothes. The sentiment was sweet; it calmed some of his nerves, even if Arik had said it with annoyance. “Can we go? I want to touch you, and I’m afraid something may have splashed on me. It’s disgusting. I don’t want it on you—hell, I don’t want it on me.”

“Sure. I’m gonna gather the trash to take outside. We got a lot done tonight,” he said, watching Arik turn away.

Arik left the kitchen, going back to the bedroom. Kellus braved the guest bathroom to get the trash bag, placing it with the others by the back door. He did a quick run-through, making sure the house and studio were locked, before leaving on certain lights to make it look like someone was home. As he started to carry the trash outside, Arik reappeared wearing his dress shirt and slacks, holding a new garbage bag he hadn’t seen when he’d made his rounds.

“What’s that?” he asked, pointing to the bag Arik held.

“My T-shirt and jeans. We can just throw them away,” Arik replied, bypassing Kellus heading through the now open kitchen door.

“No, we can’t. I’ll wash them,” he said, reaching for the bag that Arik jerked away from his hand.

“No, trust me, they’re ruined,” Arik said, holding tight to the sack until he tossed it in the outside trash can. Kellus followed with his own load as Arik walked past him toward the car, offhandedly saying, “Let’s go. I need some love. I need you to explore my ass.”

“Arik…” Kellus said, following behind him until he stopped at the kitchen door. Arik pivoted around in the middle of the driveway, waiting for him to finish locking up.

“Please don’t make any more excuses. You heard what the counselor said. Now, let’s go.” Arik’s arms extended, pointing to his car parked in the driveway. “I just need a shower then you to fuck me. Maybe again after a well-oiled massage. Then maybe again in another shower.” Arik spun around, clicked the remote, and the car roared to life. “Bring your clothes. You aren’t staying here until I’m sure the house has been sterilized. There’s other people’s nasty shit inside those bathrooms. I’ll be in the car.”

All right. Arik absolutely had an overly dramatic, bossy side. Kellus reached for the packed duffle bag he had placed on the kitchen counter earlier. On a second thought, he grabbed his bottle of medication and put it inside his bag. He liked taking his meds at the same time every day. This new schedule was throwing that slightly off. He set the alarm and locked the kitchen door.