Texas Pride

“It’s so frustrating! I can’t get anyone to believe me. I’m done with that world. That life isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. I would put this last week up against any other time in my life, and I would pick you every time. I’m done with that out there. I promise you, I’m done. This is where I want to be. Right here, right now. For me, I know if I stay off the radar, they’ll eventually leave me alone. Someday, I’ll be able to lead a normal life, but Kitt Kelly, I swear to God, if the last five days with you are any indication, I can promise you I’m gonna want you there with me.” Austin faltered in his words as he looked Kitt directly in the eyes.

“Austin… You don’t even know me.”

“I know enough.” Austin’s reply was instant.

“Is this a commitment you’re willin’ to make in return?” Kitt asked, knowing in his heart Austin wouldn’t be able to handle it long term no matter what he said.

“Absolutely I will. I have fierce jealousy going on inside me about Fisker. He was too smooth…too good looking. I think we could both easily give a commitment and follow it. Seriously, how much more could I need? I have you three, four, five times a night. I’m fucked good and happy, Kitt. Unless, I had you all day, too. I’d like that more,” Austin said.

“How do you know that about Sean? When did you see him close enough to know that?” Kitt’s question rang sharply.

“Shit…damn it, Kitt, don’t be mad,” Austin said, and dropped back on his back.

“What?” Kitt rose immediately, looking down at Austin.

“I told you we followed him in. When he got to your place, we tracked him. You were so pissed off at my men you could’ve easily blown it for me,” Austin said, looking up at the stars now, avoiding Kitt who loomed over him. It was an effort on Austin’s part to keep his eyes averted from Kitt who was right over his face.

“You told me you tracked him. It was dark. What did you do, watch me?”

“Kind of…” Austin said with a wince.

“So you knew without question before you ever asked me that night?” Kitt asked even though the answer was clear.

“Well, I didn’t see what went on in your house.” Finally, Austin’s guilt stricken eyes came back to Kitt’s. It looked like Austin was regretful, but still for a man who hid and went out of his way to be so careful.

“Damn, Austin,” Kitt muttered and fell back, breaking their stare.

“I know! I know and I deleted all the pictures.”

“You took pictures?” Kitt popped his eyes back in Austin’s general direction.

“We had to know who Fisker was…head off anything trying to get in. If I needed to leave, I needed to know.” Austin quickly defended his actions.

“He was there for me!” Kitt said and scrubbed his palms down over his eyes. Austin and his entire security team had known he was gay from the beginning. What if it got out?

“I know that now! And it made me crazy, insanely jealous, and I didn’t even know you!”

“See? You don’t know me like I’ve been telling you. If you did, you’d know I wouldn’t ever tell anyone you’re here. I don’t spread a bunch of bullshit gossipy crap! Austin, you took pictures of me and Sean, shit!” Kitt sat up with his legs bent, and stared out in the night.

“Kitt…damn it, I was wrong to have those pictures taken. I knew the minute I got them it was wrong, and I do know you now. Do you remember when we were in high school? You played baseball on Varsity. I was a senior. Remember that?” Austin rose up next to Kitt, wrapping an arm around his back, trying to pull Kitt to look at him.

Kitt refused to answer.

“I watched you shower. I felt like such a perv, but I did watch you. You grew into this hot body that year. Everyone knew your dad sucked. He worked you hard, too hard. You stood in that shower with the water pouring down you. All these muscles flowing, and I watched and I remembered. I still remember.”

Memories of that day came flooding back to Kitt. He’d thought he was the only one in the showers, but he’d caught sight of Austin leaving the showers from the corner of his eye. When he’d realized who had just turned away, his dick had grown instantly hard. It was a hard-on to end all hard-ons, and he’d been worried Austin might have seen him get hard. At the time, Kitt had thought Austin left because he didn’t want to be there with him. And now…to think Austin stood there looking at him like he would look at Austin...damn!

Kitt shoved himself up off the sleeping bag. Austin reached for him, but he moved away. Kitt had all the same possessive emotions coursing through him as Austin seemed to have. He was jealous as hell of Austin going back to Cara and that life, especially now he knew Austin swung both ways.

Kitt knew what he and Austin shared wasn’t love no matter how strong it felt. All this flowing through him was sexual tension and deep seeded lust, nothing more. It was his pin up poster come to life, materializing in front of him.

He bent down close to the fire, resting his arms on his knees and watched the flames flicker. Why was he being asked to give up Sean when Austin had a line of ready sex partners just about everywhere...doing both men and women sure made it easy for him to find someone to fuck. How pathetic would it look for him to have already broken it off with Sean? Except, Austin had thought about him over the years. Damn it! Kitt’s runaway heart burst at the possibility of what that might mean.

“You’re a frustrating man, Kitt Kelly. Come back to bed.” Austin matched Kitt’s position and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. He leaned in, but didn’t pull Kitt to him. He just looked at him. “I’m sorry. I’ve asked too much, too soon. I need to prove myself to you. This whole relationship thing is all new to me. Here’s what I should have said. I’m not going to be with anyone else, you’re enough for me. You can do what you want, I’m fine with it. Now come back to bed. It’s getting late, and I want to make love to you at least a dozen times before morning.” Austin grinned and kissed Kitt’s shoulder.