“Goddamn, Kitt. You spend your entire life alone. He’s a good guy. And, I noticed you seemed happier over the last few weeks, and it doesn’t make me a girl that I noticed. You’re like a brother to me. It’s probably not a bad thing to have someone sharing your life after you’ve been all alone for the majority of it. I get it’s probably hard as hell to allow someone in. There has to be a lot of fear in that, but I still think you should go talk to him. I would if I were you.”
“Is his agent still here?” Kitt asked.
“I think so, but he’s leaving tonight. All this isn’t his thing,” Mike said. Kitt came to a stop at the back of his truck and Mike walked up to him. “How’s the cuttin’?”
“A little behind.”
They stared at one another for a long minute.
“I can come in the morning,” Mike offered.
“Nah, we’ll catch up with Jose back on business. I’ll call you if it gets more behind.”
Mike nodded and climbed into his truck. He started the ignition and rolled his window down.
“You should’ve told me. It wouldn’t have made a difference. You gotta know that, somewhere deep inside you.” Mike put the truck in reverse and drove past Kitt. “Now go talk to him. Bye.”
Kitt watched the taillights of Mike’s truck disappear. The relief was staggering. Now there was just a hole the size of Texas in his heart where Austin was concerned. He ran his fingers through his hair, and then tried to pat it down, knowing he caused it to stand up in every direction. Kitt forced himself to the house. His heart pounded in his chest with every step he took. He deserved nothing less than to have Austin slam the door in his face, but he needed to try to apologize.
As he got to the steps of the front porch, he heard laughter. Austin’s agent was laughing, or at least Kitt assumed it was Seth. Hell, it could have been his own replacement in there laughing with the both of them. Or, even worse, the agent could be his replacement. Anger shot through him at the thought and jealousy took its hold. Part of him wanted to turn and forget making amends. If Austin could be so happy while Kitt suffered beyond reason…yeah, the other part of him won. That part wanted to tear the shit out of whoever Austin laughed with right now. His arm reached up and knocked hard on the door on its own accord.
Seth answered, took a step back and opened the door wider. His eyes narrowed as he looked at Kitt. That look kicked Kitt’s heartbeat up that much more. He clenched his fist thinking how easy it would be to right hook the guy in the open doorway. He could drop Seth straight to his knees. Wouldn’t that send Austin a message about their future? Hell, maybe it would send Austin packing, and Kitt could finally get on with his life.
As Kitt warred within himself, Seth looked over his shoulder toward Austin. The door was open enough to see Austin sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal. Their eyes collided, and the smile Austin wore left his face. He stood, concern spread across his brow.
“Kitt? What’s wrong?” Austin asked moving toward him.
“I’ll leave you two alone.” Seth darted to the side of Kitt as he looked back at Austin. He made a wide sweep around Kitt and jogged across the porch, taking the steps down to the yard.
Kitt didn’t move from the spot he stood rooted in. He just stood there looking at Austin who stood in front of him. His heart settled, and the aggression of his deep breath turned more to a pant. Austin was about the best looking man Kitt had ever seen. He had no hard edges, he was just smooth and captivating. Kitt’s dick grew hard.
“What’s happened?” Austin asked again.
“Nothing…there’s nothing wrong. I came over and talked to Mike, and I just…” Kitt stopped and stared for one full minute before he continued, “I’m sorry, Austin. I was wrong. Is it too late?”
“You’re angry.” Austin was clearly confused.
“I’m not angry.” Kitt shook his head to affirm his declaration and forced his face to relax.
“Then what’s this?” Austin asked, moving his hand toward Kitt’s stance.
“Nothing, it’s nothing.” Kitt took a step back and breathed in deeply, hoping oxygen would somehow find its way to his brain. He had to get a hold of himself and quick. His eyes searched the dark and spotted Seth a few hundred feet away, walking aimlessly in open pasture.
“There’s nothing between us, but friendship.” Austin came outside to stand behind Kitt. Not close enough to touch, but close enough that Kitt could smell his cologne.
Those were hard words to hear. They said it all and were very clear. His heart fell to his knees and he closed his eyes. He should leave, but didn’t. He’d come this far and wasn’t opposed to begging for a second chance.
“I don’t want just friendship. I want so much more than that. I was wrong to send you away. Are you tellin’ me it’s too late?” Kitt asked, still facing the pasture. His head hung low, his eyes were closed and seconds felt like minutes as he waited for Austin to answer.
“What? No, I mean Seth and I. It’s just friendship between us.”
This time he felt Austin’s breath on his neck. Austin’s body brushed against Kitt’s. It took a full minute for him to understand the words with the way his body reacted to just Austin’s slightest touch. He forced himself to calm down, to register each word Austin spoke. It was only as Austin stepped completely into him that he got what Austin tried to say.
“I miss you, Kitt.” Austin finally turned Kitt around, and they stood chest to chest, both with their hands in their pockets.
“I miss you, too.”
A smile lit Austin’s face, but he didn’t reach out to Kitt.