“Because while I didn’t know you, you were still perfect,” he shrugged. “You didn’t have any flaws. Any of those annoying personality traits that would normally turn me off.”
I imagined the types of girls who dated Boone… and the broad spectrum of annoying they might be.
“And now?”
He reached down, sifting his fingers through the wet tangle of my hair. “Now you’ve ruined it. You suck. You’re everything I never wanted, and—”
I poked him again, harder this time, and he broke out laughing. Before I could do anything else he pulled me right up on top of him. He started kissing me again, and I went lightheaded in seconds.
Three guys.
It was like getting slapped in the face with reality.
You slept with three guys… in as many days.
I felt queasy at the statement, even though it was self-imposed. The words floated through my head in a daze, dragging emotions and feelings to the surface that somehow didn’t seem real.
Three guys, Morgan. THREE. GUYS.
It was unheard of, at least for me. I’d had friends who’d done it — known girls who’d given themselves to more partners than that in a week’s time. It was shocking at first, coming to college and seeing all this apparent recklessness firsthand. Realizing that the morals and standards I’d grown up with weren’t exactly the commonplace norm.
But now I was doing it. I was the one making excuses for my own behavior, when in fact my behavior made absolutely no sense at all.
And yet…
And yet somehow I wasn’t sorry.
Not even in the least.
It made me feel wrong, looking down at the situation as a whole. Wrong and shameful and even dirty. But individually, the way it played out? Everything seemed to make sense at the time. And then I realized something else, too.
I’d wanted it.
Shane and I had sort of fallen into each other out of necessity, the mutual attraction being just too much to stand. And with Jeremy? The two of us clicked on so many levels, socially and emotionally, that physically it was easy to accept him as an extension of Shane.
But Boone…
Boone Silva was a whole different story. Just looking at him was enough to melt away even the most prude girl’s fiercest resolve. And on top of that he’d noticed me. He’d been watching me, all these months, all this time. That fact alone was mind-blowing. Just the idea that—
“What are you thinking about?”
Boone’s voice was deep and melodious. He was still playing with my hair.
“Nothing.”
“You’re thinking about something.”
“Okay fine,” I relented. “I was thinking how surprised I am that you actually noticed me. You, the big handsome alpha frat-boy. Me, the nerdy shy girl. It’s like something right out of a cheesy movie. One of those silly romantic comedies that always—”
“I hate being a frat-boy.”
His words didn’t register at first. When they did, I was stunned. So stunned I actually sat up. “What?”
“I never wanted to be in a fraternity,” he shrugged. “Shit, I didn’t even want to go to college.”
I shook my head in disbelief. It made no sense.
“Then why did you?”