You love them.
It was true. I did love them. I loved them with all my heart, my body, even my soul.
And the scariest part about the whole thing was that it wasn’t scary at all.
December brought snow. It blanketed the world outside our home, making it beautiful and picturesque. The boys spent more time with me, even enjoying the crisp outdoor air. We made snowmen out in the garden. Even ice skated across the frozen lake.
Nothing was off limits. Nothing held back. It was four people enjoying each other; three friends as close as brothers, and me, the one person who could give them something they were all missing: a loving girlfriend.
I was the final missing piece of the puzzle. The experience they could finally share, wholly and completely, without fear or guilt or remorse.
And I loved it.
With Christmas approaching, we went out shopping together. It was fun, picking a guy, taking him out, letting him tell me what kinds of gifts the other guys wanted. And then there was the day they all went shopping together. To get me a gift… although to be honest, I already had everything I’d ever need.
It was all so picture perfect. So amazingly flawless, it was almost like a dream. Nothing could drive us apart. Nothing could keep us from continuing down the path of exploring and loving each other…
Until the day Kyle and Dakota came home to announce they were being deployed.
Thirty-Eight
SAMMARA
They were notified on a Monday. By Thursday, they were gone. They’d miss Christmas, and that part was shitty. So we had our own little Christmas before they left… exchanging gifts and everything, right under our tree.
It was fun and exciting, even if it was overshadowed by their imminent departure. Kyle and Dakota put on their game faces and made it good for us though. We slept in and drank coffee spiked with rum by the fire, while playing games and Christmas songs and trying to be cheerful. The two of them promised they’d stay safe, and be back soon. Ryan and I promised we’d have the house finished by the time they returned, even though none of us had any idea when that might be.
Of course I gave each of them my sluttiest sendoff. Dakota I took out to lunch, just the two of us. On the way back I had him turn off into the woods, where I proceeded to give him the dirtiest, sloppiest blowjob before climbing on and fucking his brains out right there in the cab of his truck.
Kyle got me later that night, in his bedroom, just the two of us. First I dressed in his favorite outfit: fishnets and garter belts. Then, while he was in the shower, I tied myself face-down on his bed and left a note on my back telling him he could do whatever he wanted…
I was still proudly sore by the time we said our goodbyes. I gave them two of the longest, most heartfelt kisses of my entire life, and then the car that was sent for them was pulling away, leaving Ryan and I in the dust.
I felt sad. Somewhat worried. All the same emotions any soldier’s wife or girlfriend must feel when her man is rushing off into the unknown. Then again, this was why I was here. To be there for them when they got back. To not let a deployment interfere with our relationship, no matter how long or how rough it might be.
Ryan did his best to console me, and that made it easier. The house was quiet with just the two of us, and at first it was awkward. Not awkward between us — no, that part was perfect. Awkward as in not having as many voices, as many people always milling around. Even the construction crews had dwindled down to a few interior experts, and they weren’t always there, especially with the holiday coming up.
Overall, the house just seemed colder and emptier without Kyle and Dakota.
“Let’s go somewhere!” I told Ryan one night, straddling him on the couch.
“You mean like around here?”
“No, I mean go go,” I said excitedly. I kissed his ear. His neck. Down across his chest… “Someplace far.”
Ryan was a homebody, and I knew getting him out would be a struggle. So I picked the one place he knew. The one place he might be likely to visit again, and therefore bring me along with him.
“Take me to New York!”
He looked back at me skeptically. “Now? Really?”
“Yes!” I squealed. “It’ll be good to get out of here for a bit. Especially with the others gone. We can put the renovations on hold for a few days. See Manhattan during Christmas!”
My tongue traced down the salty expanse of his chest, my mouth closing hotly over one nipple. I bit it playfully and he jumped, shoving his bulge upward against my panty-covered sex.
“C’mon,” I said. “I’ll be fun!”
His breathing was shallow and rapid, and I didn’t have to look to know his eyes were closed. Slowly I traced circles around his nipple. After a while I worked my way downward, stopping along his deeply tanned abdomen to plant little kisses all along the flat of his stomach.