“Who the hell said this isn’t a real relationship?”
Forty-One
SERENA
I sat at the kitchen table in complete silence, trying to swallow. For some reason I couldn’t.
“Serena?” he pressed.
I shrugged. “I— I don’t know. I just thought…”
“What?” asked Cole.
“I just figured this was us having fun. The three of us.”
“Is that what you want?” asked Jacob. “Fun?”
The question seemed almost absurd. At the same time… it didn’t.
“Yes,” I said hesitantly. “I mean no. I mean…” I cocked my head. “Shit, I don’t know what I mean.”
“You said you loved us a minute ago,” Tate pressed. “Did you mean that? Or were they just words?”
I took a deep, shuddering breath. The guys sat around me, arms folded, waiting on my answer.
“Want the truth?”
“The
truth would be nice,” said Jacob. “Yeah.”
“Fine.”
I exhaled slowly, letting it all go. The stress, the worry, the consideration for how they might see me. As the breath left my body, I let it all fall away. Every last piece of armor. Every last thing that was keeping my guard up, and preventing me from speaking my heart.
“I don’t just love you boys,” I said genuinely, looking them each in the eye. “I think I’m in love with you. I love you for how sweet and gentle you are,” I said, turning toward Jacob. “And I love you for your strength,” I said to Tate. “For always knowing what to do.”
Cole’s hand was still in mine. I closed my other palm over it.
“And I love you for your sacrifice, and your sense of family,” I told him. “You treat me like family, even though we’re not. And that means the world to me.”
Their expressions were softer now, and that warmed my heart. There was understanding in their eyes.
“Of course it doesn’t help that all three of you are hot as hell,” I laughed through my tears. “And that my attraction to you boys is off the fucking charts.”
“That street goes both ways,” Tate answered smoothly.
“But yeah,” I sighed, as I finished up. “All three of you are the man I always wanted. Strong. Caring. Sweet. Only you’re men, instead of a single man. I got involved with all three of you at once, together, and now I’m stuck loving you equally.”
I kicked back, glancing at each of them in turn. I’d given them everything and held nothing back. I was as vulnerable as I’d ever be, and if that ended up getting me hurt again so be it. But it felt amazing to get it all off my chest. To tell them what I’d been thinking, these past wonderful weeks.
It was Jacob who spoke first.
“You know you’re our girlfriend, right?”
The question didn’t feel rhetorical. I nodded in answer.
“I mean, I’m not looking to ‘peel off’ and date anyone else,” he went on. “I love you. You alone. And I’m pretty sure I can speak for the others, when I say—”