Quadruple Duty: All or Nothing

“Here,” said Ryan. He handed me my comfy sweat-clothes. “You’re shivering.”

We all got dressed. It made me feel a little better, less vulnerable. Less—

“Listen,” Ryan began, sitting back down. “I want you to know that—”

“What if I can’t get pregnant?” I blurted.

Both men shook their heads at the same time. As if the idea were instantly preposterous.

“Sammara, that’s not going to happen.”

“But how do you know?” I demanded. My words were followed by an uncharacteristic silence. “You don’t know, do you? And that’s just it. Nobody knows! You’re saying whatever it is you think I want to hear.”

“I know that you’re healthy,” said Ryan. “And that those amazing hips are built for a lot of things, children being one of them.”

I dried my tears with one corner of the comforter. My eyes were puffy. My head was reeling.

“And I know you’ll be an amazing mother,” added Kyle. “And that—”

“What if you’re both wrong?”

An uncomfortable silence settled over the room. All of a sudden the pattering of the raindrops seemed more intrusive than soothing.

“You’ve all been trying to get me pregnant for six months now,” I said miserably. “And not just trying, but damn near filling me to overflowing!” My face went sour. “I’ll bet no woman in the world has been this thorough. Who needs an ovulation calendar when you’ve got four boyfriends who—”

“Four fiancés,” Kyle corrected. “Four future husbands who are going to love you regardless, no matter what.”

“Even if I can’t carry children?” I countered. “Are all four of you willing to miss out on that?”

They each took one of my hands and squeezed it. “There are ways around everything,” said Ryan. “But yes, we’d love you no matter what.”

“No matter what, Sammara,” Kyle repeated sternly. “And we mean it.”

I sniffed again, and one of them handed me a tissue. I had no idea where they’d even gotten it from.

“Look, I’m not even going to begin to speculate,” Kyle went on, “but I will say this: when it comes to work you’ve been pretty stressed.”

I nodded glumly. “That’s what Melissa said.”

“And she’s right,” Kyle went on. “You’ve been spreading yourself too thin, what with all the staging and renovations and potential new construction. You’ve been jumping from bank to bank. Worrying about securing loans, when you really don’t have to.”

“Yes I do.”

He sighed heavily. “Sammara, we’re a family. I wish you’d just let us fund you. We have more than enough money put together, and—”

“And I told you a million times,” I cut in. “Either my business succeeds on its own, or it fails on its own. But it does either of those things on its own.”

I wasn’t trying to be mean. I was actually very appreciative of all the support they’d given me, especially when it came to starting me off. Universal Designs wouldn’t even exist if it hadn’t been for Ryan and Jason, who’d been there at a critical time I’d needed them most. At a time I didn’t even realize I’d needed them…

But money was where I drew the line. I wanted to make my own way, just as they’d made theirs. For me, the biggest danger was going bankrupt. It paled in comparison to the dangers they faced as Army Rangers, all four of them, every time they went out in the field…

“If you weren’t so stressed about the funding,” offered Kyl

e. “And if you hired another one or two people to help you…”

He let the words trail off. They knew how I felt, at least for now.

Thick fingers touched my face, caressing it lovingly. I turned and Ryan was holding my chin in his hand.