Chapter 1
—Melissa
“Come on, baby, get your shoes on,” I urge Jimmy.
He folds his arms across his chest and pouts. Three freckles form a triangle on his nose. My little man is getting taller, losing his baby fat and gaining a rotten attitude in its place.
“Please, if you show mommy how fast you are we can get a treat soon.” I glance at the clock. If we don’t go now, Jim will be here and if he catches me trying to leave with his son he’ll kill me first. The evil bastard may hate me, but he does love Jimmy. It’s me he can’t stand. The feeling is mutual. I was so stupid for ever getting involved with him. For ever thinking he would leave his wife. The empty promises—I’ve heard them all. There is nothing here for me save my son, and he’s coming with me.
My step-brother’s finally settling down and making roots in a place called Webb Hollow. Somewhere in Tennessee. Says he will get me on my feet. All I gotta do is put my boy in the car and drive. Leave everything behind. Not that I have much to start with.
I look over to see Jimmy is finally strapping his sneakers on his feet. He begged for them for a week. They have the Superman emblem on them and light up whenever he takes a step. He stomps his feet and giggles, smiling at me big. “That’s my big boy. You wanna go for a ride and go see your Uncle Shawn?”
He nods eagerly. His green eyes sparkling with excitement.
With my purse hanging from my shoulder, I take his tiny hand in mine and let out a breath. There are eight steps to the car. I don’t even bother locking the front door of the rundown doublewide I’ve been renting. Jim will arrive soon and once he realizes that I’m gone for good all hell will break loose. Like I said, he loves his son. So much so he wants him to be just like him. So much so that he saw nothing wrong with giving him sips of beer at the bar and allowing him to watch him smoke crack at only three years old.
When I found out from Shayla what had been going on while I was working I was so fucking pissed. Shayla is Jim’s oldest daughter. Jimmy’s half-sister. Said her mom, Tasha, who is Jim’s wife tried to put her foot down but all that earned her was a pop in the mouth with his fist. One thing I can say for Tasha is she’s always done right by Jimmy and me. When I first got with Jim I was in a bad place. Doing drugs, sleeping around. Whoring myself to get by…to fuel my bad habits, but all that changed when I found out I was pregnant. I did everything I was supposed to do. I reported to my social worker, attended every meeting. When Jimmy was born though he was still addicted to drugs, because of me, because of the program I was in to make things right.
Tasha stepped up and took custody of my son when the state wanted to give him to foster care. She even told me she didn’t blame me and had forgiven me for having her husband’s son. She welcomed me into her home, gave me a place to lay my head so I could still be with my baby. Looked the other way when I couldn’t break free of the hold Jim had on me. I was so brainwashed by the man that I couldn’t see right from wrong. I came into that woman’s home and screwed her husband while she took care of my child. She even took care of me when I relapsed. Held my hair when I puked. Waited on me hand and foot.
She got me clean. Showed me who Jim really was. Who I had become. I wasn’t a good person, most days I’m still not, but I got my shit together. I started dancing to pay my way through beauty school. I was handling my shit then Jim got hurt at work and went on a downward spiral. He’s doing bad shit and when he’s been smoking meth he gets mean. I?
?m done with the mean. I’m done with him.
My fingers fumble as I get Jimmy strapped into his booster seat. Climbing into the driver’s seat, I go to start the car, but the engine isn’t turning over. Three more tries and still nothing happens. With no other choice I get out of the dented-up hunk of junk and lift the hood. That bastard unhooked my alternator. At least he didn’t take it like he did last time. I reconnect it to the battery, get back inside the rust box on wheels, and thankfully the car starts up on the first try. However, as I am tearing down the gravel driveway with one hand on the wheel and the other hanging out the window flipping the bird to the sky, screaming, “Fuck you, Jim,” he cuts me off at the end of the driveway.
He stops his truck and starts to get out. “Listen, tell Daddy we’re going to get your treat okay. Nothing more,” I whisper to my son, praying for once that he listens to me.
Jim approaches the driver’s side and I offer him a weak smile. “Going somewhere?” He rests his arm on the roof of the car as he leans down eye level to me and spits tobacco on the ground.
“To the Dollar Tree. I promised Jimmy a new toy. He was so good at school today. Learned to write his name.”
“That so?” He looks to the backseat at Jimmy, waiting for an answer.
“Let’s go.” He kicks at the back of the passenger side seat as he cries and rubs at his eyes.
“Seems to me he don’t deserve it acting like a big baby,” Jim states gruffly, but reaches into his back pocket and pulls his wallet out. He hands me a twenty-dollar bill. “Stop and get a pizza too. Lord knows you didn’t fucking cook no dinner worth eating. Not fit for the damn hogs. More like hog shit.” He grunts and farts. Smelly bastard.
“Sure thing.” I accept the cash. He leans back down getting in my face. His thumb tilts my face up, forcing me to meet his eyes. I try to fight the bile rising in my throat as his lips brush over mine, his breath reeking of his chewing tobacco. Forcing his tongue into my mouth I nearly vomit straight into his mouth when I hit a wad of his nasty ass chew with my tongue and some of the juice goes in my mouth.
“Hurry back now. Been missing you lately.” His fingers flick my nipple and I grimace.
Jimmy starts screaming again and Jim shakes his head as he climbs back in his truck to go around me. I let out a shaky breath and once he is around me I get the hell out of dodge only making it just out of his line of sight before I have to pull over and puke.
Once I have my shit together, I do take my baby to the Dollar Store and put that twenty Jim gave me to good use. I let Jimmy pick him out some toys and a couple of snacks for the road. It’ll be the last thing that man ever does for him if I have any say in the matter. Today is the last time Jim Case will have ever seen his son. A very small part of me feels bad that Jimmy won’t know his father and will hopefully one day forget all about him, but I know I am doing the right thing.
Eventually, I cross the border from Indiana into Kentucky and call my step-brother. “Where should I meet you at?”
He fires off the name of a motel and I drive another four hours. I pull up outside the rundown motel next to Shawn’s motorcycle. I know it’s his because his nickname is painted on the tank with a rooster’s head. My little man is asleep, so I leave him in the car while I knock on the door.
I hear him shuffling around and the curtain pulls back at the window. Shawn grins at me and throws the door open, pulling me into his arms for a bear hug.
“Damn, look at you all grown up and shit. Where’s my nephew?”
“Asleep in the backseat.”
“You drove all the way here in that?” Shawn shakes his head. “I promise you, shit is about to get a helluva lot better for both you.”
I nod, trying not to cry. It’s been so long since I’ve seen my step-brother. It’s been so long since I had real hope of a better life. I can’t believe I really did it. I really left Jim for good this time.
“Your hair is so long,” I tease, yanking on his long blonde hair that is almost identical to mine even though we aren’t blood related.
“Think you can help me with something?”
“Name it.”