I swallow hard and nod. I’ve never been more nervous in my all my life. I follow her up the stairs to the bathroom and I run the water while she strips. She is so damn beautiful inside and out.
“Isa,” I start to speak but she cuts me off.
“No, Tristian I am going to do the talking.”
“Okay, I’m listening.” I undress waiting for her to say what is on her mind. Waiting for her to tell me how sick I am and how she never wants to see me gain, even though she is here with me now. She could still be in shock. I can’t believe she pulled the trigger.
I get into the tub and she gets in after me settling between my legs with her back against my chest as the warm, soapy water fills up around us. We relax for a minute, and I cradle her head against my shoulder, planting soft kisses along her neck.
“Talk to me Isa, why did you shoot Goldoni?”
“I’ll get to that, but first, you need to know that I remember everything. All of it.” I tense unsure of how she feels about what we have shared. “Most of all, I remember what you have been unable to forget. It wasn’t your fault Tristian, and I don’t blame you or hate you even a little. I love you. I loved you then, even if it was wrong. But more than that I love you now.”
Her words hit me like a shot to the heart. She continues to talk telling me about the accident she lost her memory from, the one that killed her Lita, Iris. I’m trying to follow what she is saying and listen to her story, but inside my head I am twelve years old and my father is yelling at me.
He caught me kissing Isa. “That’s not the way you do it boy. A real Vandacamp uses his tongue. Give her the tongue Tris.” Isa is staring at me, her hand is shaking in mine. “Go on boy don’t be a pussy. Do it.” He snarls, curling his lip up at me, in an angry scowl.
Scared of what he will do if I don’t do as he says, I look to Isa, searching her eyes for permission. Isa nods at the question behind my dark eyes. So I kiss her again this time putting my tongue in her mouth.
“That’s good son, real good. Now take your clothes off both of you.” We both freeze at his words.
I shake my head not wanting to remember further. But the memory won’t stop.
My father takes off his belt and shoves Isa out of the way before striking me with the metal buckle. “I said undress both of you!” he growls, hitting me again, repeatedly.
Isa begins to cry and she throws herself over my frail body. Her tears wash over me, washing away my own pain. I hate to see her so upset. “Don’t hurt him. I’ll do it,” she cries sitting back up wiping away her tears on the sleeve of her dress.
“No Isa, don’t,” I beg as she removes her favorite white dress.
“Shut up boy!” My father barks. “Now take off his pants,” he orders her.
Isa does as he asks and he undoes his zipper after she pulls my underwear down.
“This is what you do.” He takes his penis in his hand and begins to rub it.
“Rub on him until his looks like mine girl. Go on.”
Isa’s hands are shaking and she begins to cry as she touches me. I grab at her hands yelling for her to stop. I don’t want her to do it.
“Pathetic boy, you ain’t no Vandacamp.” He takes my hand and forces me to touch Isa where I shouldn’t with his hand as a guide.
“Her privates are called private for a reason,” I whisper as Isa and I both cry. “I will kill him for this Isa I swear it,” I whisper quietly in her ear, afraid he will hear.
“I’ll help you do it Tris,” she promises back.
After the first time he had us doing it often, even when he wasn’t around. It was mine and Isa’s secret.
The sloshing of water and Isa grabbing my face to wipe away my tears brings me back into the here and now. “Don’t give that bastard anything more that doesn’t belong to him Tris. I am yours and you are mine. Nothing can change the way we feel about each other. NOTHING. Not then and not now.”
I twist away from her. “You should be disgusted by me Isa. I’m sick and I don’t deserve you.”
“I decide who or what is good and right for me, Tristian. I had a choice back then and I have one now. I chose you and I will choose you every time. I love you! End of story.”
She cradles my tattooed face in her hands and presses her mouth to mine. Her tongue sweeps across my lips. She straddles my hips and I can’t help from growing hard at her touch. Her hips roll against me and the water splashes onto the floor.
“Take me to bed Tristian and show me and everyone else that nothing can stand between us. It never could.”
I follow her from the tub to my bed and give in.