“I wasn’t until you just said his name. Maybe we should just stop this,” she suggests.
“Do you want me to stop, sweetheart? You say the words and I will. I’ll go back to the bar and find someone who wants to be with me.” I pause. “I hate knowing you share a bed with him. I hate knowing he gets to hold you at night.”
“He doesn’t. He doesn’t hold me. I feel like I am sleeping next to a stranger. I want… I wish it were you lying next to me,” she confesses, and I slam into her without mercy and I take. I take what I want, and I take what she gives as she pushes back against me.
My hand comes down and slaps her ass, hard. I give it to her fast and rough, pulling her hair, biting her shoulder. I keep pounding into her tight little pussy that is curving to take my dick like we are a perfect motherfucking fit. I don’t stop until I am cumming deep in her as she trembles beneath me. Afterwards, I collapse on the bed next to her in a sweaty heap as she runs her fingers across my chest, tugging here and there at the small patches of hair.
She’s quiet. Too quiet as I hold her against me, rubbing her back and kissing her softly. The front door slams shut and Conleigh goes deathly still. “Do you want me to make him leave?”
She shakes her head and blows out a heated breath. “Tell him…tell him I’m not here.”
“If that’s what you want.”
“I don’t want to see him right now. Especially after we…”
“Fucked,” I finish for her. “You’re gonna take him back, aren’t you?”
She looks away from me and my stomach bottoms out. I finally have her and she doesn’t want me. It hurts just as I knew it would, but I wasn’t expecting it to hurt so bad that I feel like I can’t breathe, that I want to punch the walls, and tell her to get the fuck out and never look back, but I don’t. I squeeze her tighter and kiss her once more. I’m not ready to let her go. I’m not sure I can walk away this time. I sure as hell don’t want to.
“I don’t know, Holden,” she cries, appearing panicked. “You don’t even know me. Not really. We just fucked.”
“I know that you love butterflies because when you were a little girl your dad used to take you to the butterfly garden. They remind you of him, before everything went wrong in his life. I know you always scrape the bottom of your yogurt with your spoon. It drives me crazy, that sound. But when you are running late and skip eating breakfast, I miss it. I know you cry when the save the animals commercials air on late night TV. I know what makes you tick. I know you love it when I breathe on your neck.”
“Holden…” she pleads.
“I’m not finished. I love the way you wear those goddamned socks. It drives me mad the way you fidget with them, tugging them up and down your silky legs. It makes me harder than a fucking rock. I love watching you twist your hair into a bun and then cursing when it falls to the side. Most of all, I love the way your eyes light up when you say my name, and the way your mouth tugs into a smile, even though you are trying to fight it. You don’t want me to know these things because the way you feel about me…baby, that’s real deep shit. It scares you, because you know if I have you…if I have your heart—I’m gonna own it. You’re scared that I will be like your dad. That I will somehow fuck everything up. And I am gonna tell you right now, Con. I will screw up, a lot. I’ve never loved someone the way I love you. It cuts me deep in my bones. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. You have consumed my every waking thought, since you came into my life. It took you choosing him right now for me to realize that I have loved you since I met you.”
“Holden, please.”
“I’m not gonna stop loving you. Not ever. You were mine the moment I laid eyes on you. I was too blind to really see it, but deep down, Conleigh.” I hold my hand to her heart. “You feel that, deep down in there and you know it. You love me too.”
“Conleigh, are you here?” Ezra’s hand smacks against the wall in the hallway. “If you fucked her, Holden, I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you both.”
“What do you want me to do, Conleigh? You name it, I’ll do it.”
“I don’t know, Holden. I don’t know.” Tears well up in her eyes as Ezra bangs his fist on my bedroom door and jiggles the handle.
Part 2
Chapter 16
Conleigh
Opening my eyes, I yawn, feeling stiff. My eyes are puffy and tender as I wipe away the remnants of my tears from the creases. A heavy, warm body presses against mine and I smile, Holden. Rolling to my left, I grin as he lightly snores, and I rub my fingers along the small patches of hair that dusts his chest. He smiles softly as he opens his stormy eyes. I nuzzle closer to him as he whispers, “Mornin’.”
A hand slides along my hip, but it’s coming from the wrong direction to belong to Holden, and I freeze as another warm body presses against my backside. “Good morning, you filthy whore.” Ezra bites down on the shell of my ear.
“She is a dirty girl,” Holden teases, joining him in a laugh.
I jerk up in bed as tears sting my eyes, clutching a sheet to my chest. I look around the room feeling disoriented. My pulse is throbbing in my throat.
I see a familiar poster on the wall of a skull and roses.
“Hey, you okay?” I hear Bailey ask, concern etched on her face.
Relief washes over me, I am at the dorm with my best friend. I look to either side instantly calming seeing both sides of the bed I occupy are vacant.
“Bad dream,” I say, breathing out, still feeling the aftershock of my nightmare.