I wanted to love you
My first
My last
Pack you away in my suitcase
Nothing but faded dreams of the past
Torn pictures
Feel your lips on my cheek
One last goodbye
My tattered heart on my sleeve
All I wanted was to love you, boy
All you wanted was to break me
We work for an hour together, and over the hour she loses her anger towards me, even smiling at times. The cameraman and sound guy have everything they need and slip out of the room. Before I tell her times up, I take the spare minutes I have before the next contestant comes for their session to make a move.
Peyton is stuffing her notebook into her bag and not paying me any attention. I catch her off guard unable to hold back what I’m feeling. Being here with her, hearing her sing, and having her alone…the moment just feels right to me. “Peyton?”
She looks up, and I see the vulnerability in her eyes. Being with me is hard for her when it shouldn’t be. The two of us used to fit together so easily it was as natural as breathing to be with her. I miss that. I miss her company so damn bad. Every city, every show, every new girl who crosses my path…none of them fill the hole she left in my heart.
“Yeah?” She looks at me expectantly.
I don’t say anything. I don’t pay her any of the compliments I was intending on. I touch her left cheek and turn her face into mine. Kissing her deeply, I’m hoping like hell she doesn’t pull away. The taste of her lips brings back so many happy memories. I don’t push for more than a peck until I feel she is into it. I can hear and feel a surprised gasp leave her mouth. Her lips move with mine in perfect harmony soothing my soul. My fingers thread through her hair as I crave more of her. Her intoxicating scent wraps around me, holding me prisoner.
A knock sounds on the door. “Mr. Lewis,” I hear the squeaky voice of that kid. I want to ignore him, but of course Peyton jerks away as though I slapped her.
“We can’t do this, Jameson. It didn’t work well the first time around.” Her lips are swollen, and the expression on her face contradicts the words that just left her sweet mouth. She doesn’t regret kissing me in the slightest. Need fills her gaze as she stares at me. I’m not giving her the out that she is desperately searching for. Not this time. All bets are off.
“Fancy, stop fighting me.” I pull her back to me, claiming her puffy lips for keeps. This time she doesn’t pull away. God, I missed this—her. I have fucking missed her so much it physically hurts. When her tongue clashes with mine, it takes everything in me not to lift her skirt up and fuck her right here on this couch. Slow. What she needs is me to take this slow. I won’t touch her again until I know without a doubt that she wants this as desperately as I do. There’s so much that needs to be said between us.
The kid knocks on the door again. “Mr. Lewis, I’m here for our session.”
I measuredly break our kiss and pull away, breathing heavily. “We’ll be doing more of that,” I promise, seeing a hint of the girl I remember and feeling the boy I once was returning.
She bites her bottom lip. “I don’t know, Jameson. It’s too much too soon. We both were just caught up in the moment but this…” She motions between us. “It can’t and shouldn’t happen again. It won’t end well. We both know that.”
I shrug. “I know enough for the both of us, Peyton. Tonight, go back to your room, sleep on it. Tomorrow I want us to talk. About everything.” I hate bringing up the past, but in order for us to have a future, we have to.
“Okay,” she whispers and quickly gets up to leave. Giving me one last look over her shoulder, “I’ve missed you too by the way,” she says quietly, and exits the room.
Kyle looks between Peyton and me as he enters the room and smiles like he is in on some secret.
Chapter 23
Peyton
Since Jameson kissed me earlier, I can’t get him out of my head. I don’t know what came over me, but it was so easy to fall back into old habits. Being so close to him and smelling his cologne, making music together…I got swept away by the fantasy of what should have been and how easy it is to be with him. We’ve always fit together like missing pieces of a puzzle that is only whole when we are connected.
Everyone else is hanging out in the game room downstairs, but after that kiss I need to decompress and get a grip on myself. I can’t be falling back in with him so easily. Jameson hurt me. I can’t forget the past five years he’s been gone and pretend they never happened. That he’s not been out there whoring around the whole world on tour and sleeping with God knows who. I know some stuff in the tabloids wasn’t true but there must have been some stories about him that were real. Pictures don’t lie.
There’s an account on Picgram, the whole page is dedicated to his one-night stands. I stopped looking a few years ago. My heart couldn’t take it. It makes me sick when I think about it. I just had my tongue in his mouth like every other groupie on the planet. Stripping out of my clothes, I slide down into the large garden bathtub hoping to wash away his touch…the taste of his lips. Lips I alway